Yeah. Love This Guy.

Plantboy put together a great EQ party tonight. He hates parties. He hates planning. He hates being in charge. The motivation this time was a Brazilian-themed dinner. He has recently discovered just how many returned missionaries in the ward, himself included, went to Brazil on their missions. So he put on a full blown Brazilian BBQ. Like Rodizios without the $30/plate price tag. 

As I saw the enthusiasm with which he prepared so much delicious food this weekend, and explained to everybody what they were eating, I was deeply touched. An LDS mission is remarkable thing. It is 20 years ago this year that my husband went to Brazil. Yet even now, the sound of spoken Portuguese, the sight of black beans and yes, even the smell of mildew, sends him down a lane of sweet memories and stories that are touching and funny by turns. As he shared the food, music and cheap souvenirs with his brothers and sisters tonight, the deep love he still holds for Brazil and the Brazilian people was apparent in every word.

I will teach Sunday school in the morning. I hope to convey to my young class how much a mission means, not just for your growth in the church, but for your whole life. When you learn to put yourself on hold and to do nothing but love and serve for 18 or 24 months, something deep inside you changes for good. For THE good. 

There are many experiences that teach us to to love and to be unselfish. People from every walk of life, and any religion or NO religion can learn these lessons. But I still maintain that the LDS mission is a unique experience for the sheer speed at which these lessons are taught. I think it is an experience difficult to replicate in any other way. I'm grateful for the lessons of sincerity and compassion and devotion my husband learned so long ago and in that place.

And, you know, he just has a really cute face.

Only What You Take With

First of all, bonus nerd points for anyone who picks up on the movie reference in the post title.

Second of all: I love the new Sunday School/YW/YM format. I love nearly everything about it. After teaching there for nine or ten months I can give some reasons for why I think it is far superior to the previous situation.

1.  There is much variety in what I can choose from each week and each month. I can pick the topics and talks that I feel the most inspired to teach, as well as materials that I feel the most strongly about. We have spent the last couple of weeks talking about the importance of life-long learning, both in the spiritual and in the secular sense. We talked about truth and how the Holy Ghost can help us with all our learning. We talked about wisdom versus facts. We talked about preparation to bring both ourselves and others joy. I testified to my class of all boys about the importance of supporting girls in their educational endeavors. Oh! There was so much to share!

2.  If the kids are involved in the teaching, there are many chances for them to gain testimony and to practice for their own missionary experiences. This is a big "if," obviously, and has been challenging, but the kids are getting more used to these experiences and getting better at them.

3.  It is light on scriptures stories, and heavy on practical applications of living the gospel. Don't get me wrong, I think that even young children can be taught to mine the scriptures for doctrine, and stories that can serve as metaphors in our own lives. But this new program uses the scriptures as a tool rather than as a focus. These teachings seem to be attempting to make a clear distinction between a seminary-type experience (gaining a knowledge of the scriptures) and practical religion (gaining a testimony that becomes a touchstone for a life of service to others). 

In all the love, there are cautions however. My group is young, and the lessons seem ready to jump to "how do I teach others about the gospel" mode without pausing to consider that many (if not most or all) of these kids still have fledgling testimonies of their own. Sharing is definitely a way to strengthen and grow testimony, but a testimony also helps with the sharing. We have to be careful that we aren't putting the cart before the horse.

As mentioned above, the scriptures are given a supporting role and used equally with (or less than) prophetic teachings from recent conferences. While I think the balance is good, I think we also have to be careful not to make our children lazy students of the scriptures. I've been surprised by how unacquainted the children in my class are with all but the most basic scripture stories. Whereas Sunday School used to once emphasize these, it doesn't anymore. And a last caution that also matches a point above--because teachers now have so much autonomy over what is being taught, a large part of what is presented to your children is what the teacher brings with them. Emotionally. Spiritually. Intellectually. Teachers are encouraged to share experiences and ask class members to do the same. If your teen's teacher is somebody you aren't sure about (you know, the sister in your ward who prayed to find out if her canned green beans were as healthy as her home grown fresh ones and recieves inspiration that YES! They ARE!, that kind of person) then those same doctrines that make you squirm when they open their mouth in Relief Society or Sunday School are being passed to your kids. 

Childhood Revisited? Yes, Please!

We babysat an adorable pair of twins on Valentine's night for some friends who very rarely get out. (Obviously.) We pulled all the trains out of the attic where they have been for nearly two years and made a massive train set that fills the living room. So, you know, a third of the house. Observations:

1.  Despite his protests to the contrary, the 12 year-old still loves the trains. Even the little boy Thomas trains very much. He has had a hard time relinquishing control of the play and seems to remember many of the stories from the videos that have been out of the house for years.

2.  My six-year old has decided he loves the trains. This delights my heart. By the time he was big enough to "play" with the brothers, they were doing Star Wars and he never really had that super sweet little child age.

3.  Trying to help three boys get along with a wooden train set is much more difficult than just letting one or two boys have at it. (See observation #1 about the bossy 12 year-old).

4. Five kids is A LOT. Especially when two of them are 20 month old twins. But oh, wow. They are so cute.  My arms are a feeble attempt to prevent disaster. I'm sure that little girl kept thinking, "Why is this strange lady hugging me so much?"

To Do List

I think of all the things I would love to do if there was more time. I imagine in my head that if I had not gone back to work this year that I would have a delightfully clean house, three finished baby books, cupboards cleaned out and washed down, ironing always finished instead of piled up, my novel(s) finished. . . Both the ones I read and the ones I write, I would be at that target weight of 125, the yard would be weed free and my visiting teaching would be done by the fifteenth of every month.

I could go on but it is maybe better if I don't. I also need to remind myself to be realistic in these moments self-doubt and second guessing. An entirely different set of pressures and frustrations would be mine even as I accomplished my projects. I do have hope that next year will be better. There are certain, terrifying realities to being in your first year of teaching at a new school.

It seems that I used to be able to accomplish these tasks on top of my work, but it doesn't seem as possible anymore. Is it age? That my own children are busier? The distraction of technology? It is hard to say. I do hang on to hope that next year will be better. Maybe the workload won't be quite so heavy. Maybe there will be a slightly larger house to give us something to show for all our effort. Maybe we will settle into the new reality more readily. Maybe in the summer I will get to catch up on some of these projects.

Maybe.

Maybe.

But summer is already full.  Also, I cannot shake the feeling that I will be asked to teach physics next year. 

What would you do with more time. Or better yet, how do you carve out more time?

10,000 Hour Rule

Some years ago, my mom said to me that she thought my dad, who had served as a bishop as well as countless other callings and was in his 50's at the time, was, in his spiritual life, about the same place he would have been if he had gone on a mission. What she was saying is that it had taken him 30 years of active gospel living to get to the same place he might have been after a mission. It was an interesting thought, but one I tucked away and didn't think about much after. Until just recently.

Malcolm Gladwell wrote a book titled Outliers, that garnered a fair amount of press a couple of years ago. In the book he popularized the notion that, for complex tasks, 10,000 hours, on average, is the amount of time required for success at a high level. (Some have refuted his claims, but he cites his research and maintains his assertion.)

I was thinking about Gladwell recently because of an interesting essay of his regarding his rediscovery of faith. His essay, and his earlier ideas about the 10,000 hours led me to think about what it takes to become an expert in gospel living.

We talked about this idea in my Sunday School class a couple of weeks ago and ran some numbers. If you never do anything but attend church, it will take 64 years old to become an "expert."

If you do a calling that takes you up to two hours a week on top of church then you are looking more at 38 years.

If you add in 2 hours of scripture study/prayer to the mix then you are looking at 27 years.

Now add home or visiting teaching (an hour a week?) to family home evening (another hour) and random service (another hour) you get 19 years.

That is looking at about ten hours a week.

If you add weekly temple attendance to your ten hours the number goes down to about 16.

Attending four years of seminary gives you another 800 hours.

A mission probably adds another 5,500 hours in just proselyting time.

Don't get me wrong. Understanding the gospel isn't about punching an imaginary time clock. And merely going through these motions will never produce a mighty change of heart. But I maintain that not putting in the time can never sustain that converting feeling.

Many of our apostles have reiterated the notion of being "born again by degrees," possibly first coined by Elder Bruce R. McConkie. That our converting experiences happen line upon line, growing from grace to grace, and coming to a more perfect knowledge of truth. I believe strongly that they happen while we are all in the process of doing these things that fill our 10,000 hours.

What do you think? How does putting in the time help with that change of heart?