Monday, September 29, 2008

Friday Night Fights

When I said no more political posts until November, I should have said, "not many more." I just can't help it. However, I listened carefully when the annual political letter was read in church yesterday and am conceding that while my own biases will surely be revealed here, I believe that no one party or candidate has all the answers nor is the right choice for every person whose own ideas of "good government" may be different than mine.

What I think is worth discussing here, is the poll-bump that Barack Obama recieved among white suburban women voters after Friday night's debate. One poll, conducted within hours of the debate had over 60% (to McCain's 35%) saying that Obama was the "winner." At least among women--the men were split nearly down the middle in declaring a victor. So was it about Mr. Obama that prompted this disparity among the sexes? I've been thinking about it a lot this weekend and have a few ideas.

* On the economy, both candidates were fairly non-committal. There was some major criticism over this. It is important to keep in mind that both men sat in on bailout-meetings all that day, but that no agreement had been reached as of Friday night. Markets, already skittish, may have imploded with any broad statements made by either candidate that might have been seen as evidence of future policy. As such, McCain and Obama each stuck the party line--McCain counseling fiscal restraint and reassurances of the Republican Party's committment to unfettered markets; Obama calling for regulatory reforms and help for "average" Americans. Where Obama did, perhaps, make inroads with the SAHM crowd was with his emphasis on the importance of financial stability so that you can send your kids to college, pay for groceries, put gas in the car, etc.

* Foreign policy was where the distinctions between the candidates became sharper, or at least semantically they did! Within 12 hours the McCain campaign was declaring victory, patting each other on the back for the number of times McCain made it clear to Obama that "he failed to understand," or that he "just didn't understand" or that his foreign policy was "naive at best," you get the picture. My own impression was not so positive. What it seems that John McCain has failed to realize is that even if elected come November, he will inherit an ailing economy, an unpopular war and a Democrat-controlled congress who is going to rally around the upstart Senator from Chicago whose ideas they just happen to believe in. McCain's insistence that Barack Obama "doesn't understand" his own ideas hashed out over many months with advisors and military strategists, is a broader condemnation of anyone who thinks that American foreign policy is due for a course correction. McCain, for all his excellent record of bipartisan cooperation, has really drawn a line in the sand over the Iraq issue. Yes, he has experience, but there are other experienced politicians and generals who disagree with the current course of action. Is he saying that all these other people are just dead wrong, ignorant and/or naive? If so, that is a pretty paternalistic attitude from a man wanting to lead the free world. Americans, and our foreign enemies and friends alike, are pretty tired of hearing that "President knows best." I thought that much of this lack-of-experience argument would fade in light of the Sarah Palin choice. On balance, each ticket has a similar amount of experience.

* Within 24 hours of the debate the McCain campaign began running ads, triumphantly showing the number of times Obama agreed with him during the debate. McCain has a better (and of course, longer) record of bi-partisanship than Obama. Yet, this agreement despite every condescending remark thrown at Obama paints him as the candidate best poised to bring people together. Whether he will or not, of course, is a matter of opinion and speculation. Still, he seems to be trying to reassure the middle-leaning electorate that "Yes, I know I'll be a Democratic president over a Democratic congress, but I will not overlook the places where there is agreement." There is something to be said for the give-and-take, quiet dignity approach when dealing with a variety of world leaders.

* Obama became very specific talking about "taking out" AlQaeda targets in Pakistan with or without their government's approval. McCain jumped all over that, telling his colleague that even if you thought such a thing, you would never say it on national television for fear of turning allies into enemies or creating a huge backlash in the Muslim world. Perhaps a valid point, though at least it is a specific approach to foreign policy. Five minutes later, Obama made a comment that you don't get to know a Russian by looking into his soul and then going on for a minute or so, rather un-surely, about his approach to this nuclear behemoth. McCain's reply, "I have looked into Putin's soul, and I see three letters: K. G. B." Um, what happened to "even if you think such a thing, you would never say it?" Not only did he commit the same type of error as Mr. Obama, but his statement wasn't even intended to express any kind of specific policy. His own rhetoric about Russian policy was no stronger than Obamas, despite the "zinger." People are smart. WOMEN are smart. They will look for the candidate with policies that agree with their own thoughts, or seek to be educated when they don't have a clear idea. If McCain wants to win over women, he needs to seek to educate, not dictate.

* The story McCain shared about the dog tags in his posession passed on by the mother who pled with him to not let her son die in vain was very touching. McCain used this story to make the point that if we pull out now (or roughly 18 months from now as is the Obama plan) then the sacrifice of all of those American soliders is wasted. Obama's reply was just as valid about the mother who begged him not to send another child to die for a lost cause. I am certainly not going to judge each mother's approach to her grieving. I do think that McCain's own experience however, must be considered when looking at his point. He fought in a losing war. He is never shy to tell about the crucible of prisonership and torture that formed him as an adult. But according to his reasoning, the fact that he was on the losing end of a difficult war, his life-changing experience and terrible sacrifice is somehow less important. I don't buy into this philosophy any more than I believe that a person who disagrees with the Iraq war is less of a patriot.

Again, perhaps not unbiased, but I am one of those white housewives from the suburbs, and these are the things I see women picking up on. I may not be in a swing state, but I'll still vote. I hope you will too! Regardless of your political leanings, your voice is important. As we head to the polls with prayers in our hearts for the future of our country, but mostly our children, let us try not to have the "lesser of two evils" mentality, but instead say, "which candidate do I think will do the greatest good for the greatest number of people?"

Friday, September 26, 2008

Quippy Quotes

From time to time I've noticed that people do this quoting thing. I kind of like it. My state of mind right now mostly matches this gem from Colette:

"She did realize, with some dismay, that far from conquering all, love lazily sidestepped practical problems."

Now THAT is worth making a princess-movie about.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Four????

I know that the number and frequency of children you have can only be truly decided between you and your spouse and Lord. Still, what is blogging for if not to solicit random tidbits of advice from friends and strangers alike?

I am at a major crossroads in my child-bearing life. Some weeks back my mother and I were talking and I asked her why "4" seems to be such a magic number of children for people that I know. Before four kids, it seems like all kinds of random people will ask, "Do you think you'll have any more?" (Maybe this is this the case after four children as well?) She said that in her generation she felt that the magic number was 5. There are four children in my family, and mom felt like my youngest brother started school before people quit asking her if she was done.

It took 20 weeks for me to adjust to the idea of having a third son. By the time Captain Tootypants was born, I was okay with it. And now, I've accepted that I have to be careful to not end up in the middle of non-stop wrestling match at my house. I've accepted that my youngest is both the meanest and the sweetest of the three. I've accepted endless hand-me-down piles of brown and blue and green clothes that are nearly always muddy by days' end. I've even accepted the boy smell that permeates my bedroom and my kids' bedroom every morning. Some days I look at my life and think, "How did I get so lucky to have a houseful of exceptionally handsome men who each think I'm the center of their universe?" Other days I think, "Where is the daughter I have long-dreamed of?" There are days when mothering is so easy and I know that four would be nothing, and then there are other days when I want nothing more than to escape the drudgery of housework and diapers and referee-ing and, well, you get the picture.

I've had all my children for very different reasons--the first was obligation, the second was desire, the third was an act of faith. But if there is to be a #4 . . . .

This baby would have to be called "sacrifice," inasmuch as one baby can be seen as more of a sacrifice than another. We would be exceptionally crowded in our small house. We would have to think of some way to afford a payment on a bigger car. My additional schooling (and therefore earning power) would have to be put off a few more years. Even after a year of being here, I don't feel like I've really built the support system that I've had in other places--so necessary when you are hundreds of miles from any family members.

When I felt the powerful prompting to get pregnant with #3, despite Plantboy's schooling not being finished and no job on the horizon, and certainly no knowledge of where would be the following year, I took the biggest leap of faith I've ever made. I gave Plantboy about four days notice on the "I need to get pregnant now!" though we had discussed such a thing as being at least a year into the future. He prayed and he trusted me, dear man. I think I always knew there would be a great blessing attached to that decision; I hoped that blessing meant a baby daughter. The Lord knew my heart. If Captain Tootypants had been a girl instead, it would have probably taken a bolt of lightning for me to have had a fourth baby, and then my sweet baby would have never been a part of my life. My 20 weeks of adjustment over his birth was not just getting ready for a third boy; I think in my heart I was coming to terms with a fourth pregnancy.

I checked the blog of a friend today who just had her fourth baby: one of several friends in the last year to make this leap. Ever since my baby was about two months old, this battle within myself emerges about once a month. Jana's newborn has triggered these thoughts today. For "ideal" spacing, if I have a baby #4, I should get pregnant in about six months. The decision I keep telling myself can wait, cannot wait much longer.

Or maybe I've already made the decision--maybe it was made a long time ago--and my practical side cannot stop thinking about the awful logistics of such a decision. I'm struggling to do the will of the Father, knowing my heart is not in the right place. If I knew a girl was coming to us, I'd get pregnant tomorrow, logistics be damned. But the thought of a fourth boy makes me feel faintly naseous. Would I be able to love a fourth boy enough so that he never wondered if I had him just because I was hoping for a girl? Is a fourth child, for me, a total act of unselfishness since on paper it is pure insanity; or is my decision based on some completely selfish desire to have a daughter on the off-chance that she'll be the best friend I've ever had?

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

No Worries About the Boys Getting Too Sensitive

I've been wanting my boys to see Sleeping Beauty for years, but our local video store doesn't carry it. (Yes, it is criminal that they don't; and no, I'm not with it enough to have Netflix yet.) Yesterday at the Goodwill I found a copy for a couple of dollars. VHS, of course, but the kids aren't picky.


Yesterday afternoon they really enjoyed watching it. Especially the dragon part. When it was done, they played with their trains. Hearing a lot of noise from the room they were holed up in, I opened the door to find our entire wooden train set dismantled and spread across the room with every train in a smoldering (I have imagination too) heap with a large Rescue Heroes plane flying overhead.


Seeing the shock on my face, Patchy Pirate said with great intensity, "Mom, Malesifent astroyed the entire Island of Sodor."


Scallywag clarified, "With the guns on her big ship."


I backed away and closed the door with a sigh. Nice to know they identify with SOMEONE from the princess movie.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Late Breaking Dawn News

Late because anybody who REALLY cares has already read and/or reviewed it.


I finished it yesterday. And, just like the previous three, I finished it in roughly two days. In other words, even the volumes I haven't been crazy about, I just can't put down.


My first general impression was that, of the four, this one was the best written. I really liked the Jacob chapters, particularly since Bella was in her own personal hell during that portion of the book. I especially liked Jacob's chapter titles. Very snarky. I also like how she resolved the Jacob-Edward-Bella love triangle. I think I saw it coming as well, despite Meyer's best efforts to divert her readers with Jacob getting closer to Leah and Bella's visions of a boy baby. Her description of how Jacob felt about the baby as he imprinted was quite tender. Another great descriptive moment was the birth. I felt completely sick afterward and had that iron-metallic blood taste in my mouth. Very vivid: it made regular childbirth seem like a piece of cake. The third portion of writing really worth mentioning, in my mind, was Bella's transformation, particularly that first day. I've never really thought about what a resurrected body might feel like, but Meyer's descriptions make that perfect, immortal body sound wonderful. I mean, other than the burning thirst for human blood.


I really liked that there was a specific purpose for making Bella a vampire. Even at the end of the third book, I couldn't believe it was actually going to happen. I was still holding out for Edward to become human--even he says at the first of this last volume that he wishes there was a way for that very outcome. She'd made up so many other myths I thought this would work too. The whole baby-thing was a nice twist and she redeemed Bella's annoying attitude toward marriage and motherhood very well. I thought the other books really bagged on both pretty thoroughly.


Bella's instantaneous bond to her child was a lot like how I felt after having #2. I could see that, as much as she loved Edward, much of her focus re-aligned the baby's welfare. I thought that the baby's gift was particularly sweet. How often have your own children touched your face in that tender way before they could talk as a way of communicating with you? What pictures would they show us if they could? Cool stuff.


I was pleasantly surprised with how well she handled the whole sex thing. She slightly backed off from physical details (I think the word "marble" was only mentioned a few times) She gave just enough for it to be definitely a romance novel, but not enough to be totally tacky or disgusting. Maybe the physical-ness of their relationship simply bothered me less because they were actually married? Still, I have to stand by the fact that I wouldn't want my teenage daughter reading these unless she was closer to Bella's age than middle school.


With all that I liked, however, I did not like the end. As usual, Meyer spends way too much time in conversation. (Don't even get me started on the shmoopy I-love-you-more war right after their first night of wedded bruising, I mean bliss.) She builds some really great suspense for the big vamp war and then. . . . nothing. By avoiding the war she acutally left a lot of characters around for another book even though she says that she is done. Everything got sewn up a little bit too neatly for my taste. Bella's life turned out, in the end, absolutely perfect. Nobody that she ever loved even got a scratch, or I guess a nibble in this case. Enemies vanquished. A perfect, beautiful and gifted child that she never has to diaper, rock half the night, bribe to behave or watch melt down at Target during lunch time. Money, gobs and gobs of money coupled with an adoring husband who never has to work. The most gorgeous husband and generous lover a woman ever was blessed with. Latent magic powers that can bless anyone she cares to help. A best friend who didn't rip her lovely throat out even though she was cruel beyond cruel to him. Perfect, never-ending beauty . . . .


Let's just say that as each book progressed, particularly this one, I had more and more trouble identifying with Bella. She is, well, a goddess and Meyer's readers are well, mortals. Except for Meyer herself whose best-selling writing has now made her immortal.


Any suggestions about the meaning of the book jacket? I found pictures of two alternatives as well:



I started posting my not-best-selling writing today.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Check It Out

Here is the link for my new blog. I had hoped to call it myfiction. blogspot.com or hopefulwriter. blogspot.com, but these were both taken. The one that was NOT taken however was fictionforfree.blogspot. So, happy reading. It won't cost you a dime.

Friday, September 12, 2008

In Short, You Are Just Not Enough

I love Kohl's. I discovered it in Texas when it opened on 249. The rule at Kohl's, however, is don't-even-think-about-it-unless-it-is-at-least-50%-off. And better yet, hold out until they put it on clearance in just a few weeks. Besides having a lot of season ending sales right now, they were kind enough to send me a 30% everything coupon this week.



Of course I went to just buy sheets (in response to Plantboy's comment, "these sheets are really rough; they are what? Nine years old?"). But then there was also this adorable outfit for my baby who wears something that is not a hand me down about one day in never. And then I found some really fabulous "skimmers." Dark blue, stretch denim, no gap waist, my size and a petite. With my coupon they would be about $7. Perfect.



Until I tried them on. I think the idea of the skimmer is that it skims the top of the knee? The following research backs me up:

My skimmers, on the other hand, are actually kissing the tops of my calves. Still cute, only I look even shorter than my womanly 5'2" when I'm sporting them. Remember, they are already a petite. I guess is makes sense that my skimmers are more like capris: Most of my capri pants fit like floods. If I was insane enough to buy skinny jeans they would look like tights. In fact, looking at that last picture again, I think I'm only about three inches taller than that woman's legs with her stiletto sandals in the mix.


To add insult to injury, I found a too-skinny letter from Deseret Book in my mailbox when I got home. I'll spare the details of the form letter here: my last rejection was better. And worse at the same time. Stay tuned over the next couple of weeks. I am working on a second blog that will be for fiction only. I think that after I've posted the chapters of my rejected novel, I may open it up to multiple writers and do more of a fiction/personal essay type of writer's workshop. Hope springs eternal.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Not Until November. I Promise.

I will not promote any ideas or make comments on any candidates today. I have vowed not to do so until November. I am sure you have heard enough of that (at least from me) the last two weeks.

However . . . .

PLEASE make no judgments about whom to vote for until you have looked regularly at factcheck.org; it is my new favorite place. My frustration with politics is always about how to get accurate information--the candidates may or may not be useful for such. Their websites are helpful but they put too positive a spin on their own positions. NPR is good, but they seem to be skirting the actual issues in favor of the non-issues as well. And though they are getting "both" sides: the versions of each particular are so widely different that it is impossible to know what to believe. This site carefully looks at various claims made by e-mail circulations, campaign ads, speeches and commentators and either debunks or confirms them based on a variety of non-partisan sources--all carefully documented at the end of each piece. It is updated almost daily.

I found the site because I was looking for a way to verify this story from last week's New Yorker. If true, I find it a most disturbing piece of the Sarah Palin puzzle. I still do not know yet where the source material is for the extensive quotes attributed to Palin in TNY, but if she actually said all of this (it is not typically satirical portion of the magazine) then the GOP has taken a moderate, reform-minded, state-first governor (although there is some dispute about that as well) and turned her into, well, a pit-bull with lipstick. (Can somebody please explain why this imagery is something that so many women seem to find appealing?) It makes her remarks at the convention look at the best hypocritical and at worst like somebody who will say or do anything to anybody in order to get ahead.

Okay. I promise. I'm done. Just please take an extra 10 minutes today to look at the links.

Monday, September 08, 2008

42-14

All right, so the final was actually 66-24, but we left at the post title's score. If you have no idea what I am talking about, Plantboy and I had our first date in over a month at the football game with the biggest point spread in the country on Saturday. Go Aggies. And I mean that in the you-don't-even-have-a-shot-at-being-the-underdog-you-are-so-out-of-your-league sense. Still we are alumni so we supported our team. USU was beating the 35 1/2 point spread until the fourth quarter. I guess. We only made it half-way through the third.





At that point we left for Sweet Life with Drs. Jamin and Tabula Rasa. We also tailgated with them before the game, the only blue-dressed fans in the entire 80-acre parking lot. (My mind could not have even conceived of tailgating on such a scale before Saturday's massacre.) We then sat in the visitor's section, which the U of O has generously put two miles up from the field, under the jumbo-tron and right next to the student section. On the upside, I actually ran into a former student from CRMS who I just loved. He has since moved to Oregon and it was a really hilarious place to run into him.

But back to Sweet Life and the high point of this, or perhaps any other, date. Plantboy's office occasionally orders one of the amazing concoctions from this place and he'll bring me home a sliver of cake or something, but Saturday was the first time I've actually been there. As soon as I saw the flourless chocolate torte square with a chocolate cheesecake layer smothered in ganache embedded with nine perfect, huge raspberries, I didn't look back. There is no picture here because I couldn't find one to do it justice. Use your best chocolate imagination and know that you still fall far short of the goodness. The $6 cake was worth the $39 football ticket and the $30 babysitter. Really. Oh, and the conversation was great. Tabula invited another couple to come from their ward. She was a former USU attendee with three kids also and it was fun talking to her. Except she graduated in '99. The first graduating class I taught was the Class of '99. Perfect.
The weather was beautiful on Saturday: hot enough to get slight sunburn to the nose. Still, the morning coolness is telling me that autumn is on the way. To remind me of that tiny fact, and in a salute to his harvest, my adorable hubby put up* 8 pints of salsa when we got home. By himself. With ingredients mostly from our garden or the farmer's market. How cute is that? I think I may try pears this week, and homemade applesauce in a few weeks.
To end with today, I'm going to give one last shout out to summer. I think these pictures were from the ONE day in three months that my kids were looking cute and organized and extremely helpful. (I took them visiting teaching for three hours that morning.) Scallywag should have been a farmer. The part I love most about these pictures are the cargo pockets full of beans: his idea. My mother-in-law told me once that she always had to carefully empty Plantboy's pockets before washing them when he was a little boy because she never knew what random thing she would find. My washing machine has taught me the same lesson about my own little guy. Going back to school has been a bit of a blow to him, with full days for the first time this year, but he'll adjust. I'm holding up just fine. Instead of tears, I called my mother four seconds after he was on the bus and said "One down, two to go!"


*I'm loving the term "put-up" since I'm seeing it on several blogs lately. It means "canned," but "put-up" is such an old-school Mormon term. I feel like a part of the inner circle of righteous womanhood using it.

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Finally! Political Ideology I Can Agree With

No. This will not be about Sarah Palin's speech. But I am going to try very hard for this to be last political post before November. I just won't be able to help it then. Oh, and it is another long one.

After the 2000 election, it was plain to see that part of Al Gore's problem was that he simply promised too many things to too many people. His campaign promises began to look fairly ridiculous. While accusing the Republicans of serving, primarily, a single special interest group--big business; the Dems simultaneously have about 50 tiny special interests groups! Some of who are old-school bread and butter (farmers, union workers, minorities, etc.), and others who are newer to the Party (environmentalists, homosexuals, feminists, etc.) The problem is that the goals of these many special interest groups are not always compatible with one another, making it nearly impossible for the Democrats to have a cohesive strategy or approach. I was reading an article the other day about the current governor of Colorado and changes taking place in the Democratic Party. He is a pro-life Democrat.

That is NOT a typo.

In fact, his stick-to-it stance as a Catholic nearly cost him the election. I am not going to go on in any detail here about his policies or how much I like this guy, etc. (No doubt such talk would win me much criticism from my highly conservative family-in-law mostly living in Colorado. I'm not here to pick a fight, contrary to popular belief.) I am, however, going to talk about the Colorado electorate as defined by Governor Ritter and his pollster. I'll paraphrase.

Dividing the electorate into five groups, Ritter says that 20% of Coloradans are the "very liberal" base of the party. You know, the hippie feminist down the street who wouldn't vote Republican under pain of death. He called the next 16%, for lack of a better term, the "Fox News Conservatives." These are conservatives like Rush Limbaugh (and other talking heads), Rudy Guliani, and Dick Cheney who are conservative because of their powerful belief in a small government. These are your cut most taxes and services guys. They would privatize everything except for military and law enforcement. Just as the first group will NEVER vote Republican, the second group will NEVER vote Democrat, nor will they compromise. Their ideologies, regardless of what actually works, will never be compatible.

Ritter refers to the next 13% as the "moral conservatives." Some of these folks overlap the second group in their beliefs about limited government, but mostly their platform is about issues they view as moral, not political. For these folks, abortion, gun control and gay marriage especially, are the deal breakers. This group got George Bush elected, twice, and won Iowa for Mike Huckabee. They are a powerful minority, but there is a general populace frustration with them, too. In 2004, the Republican-controlled Colorado congress, in the face of a billion dollar budget shortfall, spent a huge chunk of the session arguing an amendment banning gay marriage and a statue requiring schools to say the Pledge each morning. A year later, the voters spoke and returned control of the legislature to the Democrats, which leads us to our last two groups.

That leaves more than HALF of the electorate left over. Ritter calls these are the "government pragmatists" and the "moral pragmatists." The GP's tend to be pro-choice and neutral about gay marriage, "they just want to make sure government works, but they are not liberals, and they don't think the government should be increasing. It should spend your tax dollar prudently and wisely." So what of the last group?

This 14% sliver is my group. These are people who DO have issues with gay marriage and abortion, but "at the same time, they don't want those issues to bog down the government's ability to deliver appropriate functions." And this group believes that the government does play a role in providing certain social services. This group recognizes, that for all its inefficiencies, there are things that people will only do if the government intervenes: fund shelters, school programs, business regulations. . . . .

Governor Ritter believes that he was elected because he was able to make significant in-roads in BOTH of these last two categories, but particularly the MP's. He also believes that this is the direction the Dems will have to go in order to sustain voter turn out: they are going to have to stop clinging so tenaciously to their issues of abortion rights, gun control and gay marriage or they will implode. They also have to stop trying so hard to get voters in the South (who are shifting toward being moral conservatives) and focus more to the West where the electorate looks a lot like Colorado's, with Utah being the obvious exception.

This is the place where Mr. Obama is making his in-roads as well. The evidence that this constituency is here to stay? Mrs. Clinton did NOT get the nomination. She is an old-school Democrat. Still, the transition will be slow. As the Democratic party gets younger, "greener" and more educated, where will those who don't fit this mold go? My grandmother, a farmers widow, has always been a staunch Democrat. But she has also always liked John McCain. This year, as she looks at her ballot, I think she is going to identify much more strongly with the candidate from the party she dislikes more than a young Black man from Illinois.

So what do I think about the issues?

1--I believe in equal opportunity, not equal employment. For this reason, I believe that government money for social programs should be pumped into the front end: Head Start, ESL classes and one-on-one help for ALL children in early grades, Baby Your Baby type programs (especially for poor or very young mothers), Free and reduced school lunch, free health care for children . . . . you name it: if it is for kids and has any kind of a positive track record, I say "fund it." These programs are all cheaper than prison and the other socials costs that come from dysfunctional citizens. And don't forget, our youngest struggling kids didn't choose to be the way they are. If not helped, they are practically guaranteed to repeat the mistakes of their parents.

2--I believe that church plays a role in society, but I also believe that the idea of separating church and state is the thing that protects our freedom to choose where we worship. This makes me leery of any publicly funded program that gives money to churches. Particularly when it comes to church-run schools. I'm coming around on the faith-based initiatives, but I think that there needs to be very careful oversight about the use of these monies. I am very against churches speaking out on political issues and candidates. Moral issues are different. Churches have an obligation to speak up there, but must still be very careful about raising money, setting up PACs etc.

3-- I believe that a woman "chooses" when she decides to have un-protected sex. If she DIDN'T decide to have unprotected sex (i.e., rape and incest) then she should still have a choice. I believe that the life of a mother, particularly one with children, takes precedent over the life of a fetus if it comes to a "life of the mother" issue. I think this is entirely between her and God and her family. Nobody can judge such a difficult decision. However, my anti-abortion stance is closely coupled to #4, which is not at all Republican.

4--I believe in sex education that goes beyond abstinence only. If schools are going to spend valuable time to teach it, then they need to teach what works. It is up to parents to filter that information in light of their own moral values. If the government wants nothing more than abstinence, they should pull ALL funding and not teach it at all--leave the entire subject up to parents.

5--I favor tax cuts for small corporations (not big ones, particularly those that get rid of American jobs) as well as nationalized health care to benefit companies too small to purchase reasonably affordable plans. America was built on the backs of small businesses. Our economy will collapse if we don't re-enthrone this model. If jobs are lost by movement overseas, large corporations have an obligation to re-train their workers and give them options. More American-made products probably will NOT lower prices. But ask yourself, seriously, how much more cheap junk from China do I need? Do we save money with lower prices? Or do we just purchase more? Is an ever-expanding GNP really possible? Are there other evidences of economic stability and growth?

6--Public education must be a very well-funded and locally controlled enterprise if it is to succeed. And if it doesn't succeed? We will revert to a dark time when only those with means and influence got a decent education. We are nearly the only country in the world who even attempts to educate a majority of our population until age 18. Teachers need to be well educated, decently paid, but mostly they need a student-teacher ratio that does not exceed 15:1 in regular classrooms. Our test scores could be turned around in a decade if any class over twenty students had two full time teachers--a mentor teacher and a training teacher. After teachers trained for a certain number of years (or positive recommendations), they could be promoted to mentor teachers at a greater pay scale. Again, school is cheaper than prison. And way cheaper than seeing our entire economy shipped overseas.

7--Energy policy must be driven by science and not by politicians. Markets have a role here too, but the attitude of the populace will reflect the leadership. The regulations may have to be passed (i.e. higher emissions standards) before companies will act in a responsible manner.

8--Health insurance should be for catastrophes, or hospital stays or chronic illnesses. Other medical issues (particularly maintenance) should be paid for out-of-pocket at prices much lower prices than now with an emphasis on PA's, RN's and CNM's handling most routine care. Immunizations should cost nothing.

9--Owning guns for personal, recreational use should not be incompatible with regulations designed to keeps guns away from criminals. Distinctions in the law can be made between assault weapons and hunting rifles so that our cities don't devolve into war zones.

10--God has defined marriage. If same-sex marriages are to be stricken down, however, laws allowing for couple's rights in de facto marriages should also be overturned. The second will never happen, however, because the VAST majority of people don't really believe there is anything wrong with sex before marriage, or if they do, they see it as fairly minor on the list of sins. Ultimately, I think this will come down to a civil rights issue. Except for a very small percentage of people who actually believe in abstinence before marriage, not just in principle, but in practice, most people do not see sexual behavior as a choice. They see it as a need to be met. This is significant because public opinion now is generally that homosexuality is a choice, though that idea is shifting. Personally, I believe that sexual attraction/orientation is a combination of genes and environment, but except in rare cases of genetic abnormality, sexual behavior is always a choice.

11--Any student with the grades and the desire and the ambition should have opportunity to go to college or trade school. Loans should be reasonable and at low interest rates. Tuition should be affordable. If college costs way too much for ordinary middle class folks and all of the industrial jobs have been sent to China, where will our children work?

12--Welfare should be a stopgap measure between where a person is now and where they hope to be a short time from now. Welfare should focus on what the needs of the children (health care, food, safety) are and job-training for parents. Welfare should not be funded from social security funds (which tax should be reduced and untouched, or mandated into 401K type plans for each worker), but separately. I think all welfare money should have careful oversight and that people should never PLAN to use welfare. Though I am sure I'll get really vilified for saying it, I think it is a form of dishonesty to plan a pregnancy knowing that it will be paid for whole or in part by a government program. There is faith, and then there is just expecting other people to pick up the tab.

People who run for office should talk about their own plans, goals, and ideologies. If they mention other candidates at all, it should be to show contrast and not just to criticize. Mrs. Palin was a bit heavy handed last night, I thought (like bringing up a quote said months ago that a candidate has apologized ad naseum for). But then, others said the same about Mr. Obama last week. I guess, when all is said and done, you just see what you want to see. KimBlue said that much of what we observe is based on our own pre-conceived filter. At this point, there are probably not that many people who will be swayed one way or the other by anything the candidates say. I suppose that people engaged in the process will listen carefully for the things they want to hear and the one who says the most of those things gets our vote.

Policies, even the best-intentioned ones, however, can never help people who do not want to help themselves. But perhaps good policies can help give people incentives to help themselves.

Monday, September 01, 2008

Talk From Sunday

In case you are thinking this is getting repetitive, I did do a fireside last November and speak in Sacrament meeting less than a year ago. There is a new counselor in the bishopbric over talks and I am thinking that he lost the original list or something. At least I gave a new talk. That is more than I can say for . . . well, I won't go there. Because it was a REALLY great talk: who cares if he gave it twice?

I am not sure how well this will load because of the footnotes (I know that seems a little, well, over the top, but somebody wanted a copy so I was more careful than normal). It is also quite lengthy; I'm too lazy on our last day of summer vacation to edit. What I WOULD like to know, however is if anybody knows where I can get some extremely cheap and user friendly web hosting for PDF pages? I am thinking of publishing some of my stuff on-line, linking it through here and removing all personal identification from my manuscripts, but the blogger format is all wrong. I want to link PDF protected pages from my home page. Anyway, if you have any advice, skip the talk, and make a comment to give it to me.


Preparedness

When we were given the topic of “preparedness” today, I immediately thought about food storage and panicked. Once my mind began seeing past hundreds of quarts of canned peaches that I don’t have, however, there was a story that came very clearly to me that I wanted to share. It was not immediately apparent why I should, but as I’ve pondered and prayed, I understand why the Lord would have me share this very personal experience.

During my freshman year of college, there were a series of difficult trials that happened to several friends and family members. Although none of these trials happened to me directly, each circumstance greatly affected my outlook. I had been raised in the church, but it wasn’t until I was faced with such life-altering trials that I really began to seek and find my testimony. And then, during finals week of my freshman year, President Benson died. Within days of the funeral, President Howard W. Hunter was sustained prophet and held a press conference.

Wasting no time in declaring his prophetic vision for the church, this soft-spoken and gentle man said that he had two directives for Church members. The first was to look to the Savior as the supreme example in our lives, doing in all things what he would do. He then said,

“Secondly, and in that same spirit, I also invite the members of the Church to establish the temple of the Lord as the great symbol of their membership and the supernal setting for their most sacred covenants. It would be the deepest desire of my heart to have every member of the Church be temple worthy. I would hope that every adult member would be worthy of—and carry—a current temple recommend, even if proximity to a temple does not allow immediate or frequent use of it.

“Let us be a temple-attending and a temple-loving people. Let us hasten to the temple as frequently as time and means and personal circumstances allow. Let us go not only for our kindred dead, but let us also go for the personal blessing of temple worship, for the sanctity and safety which is provided within those hallowed and consecrated walls. The temple is a place of beauty, it is a place of revelation, it is a place of peace. It is the house of the Lord. It is holy unto the Lord. It should be holy unto us.”[1]

Perhaps I had matured, or because of my new-found testimony, it was the first time I remembered really standing up and taking note of what the prophet said. I replayed those words of the temple as “the great symbol of our membership.” That resonated with me, even though I had very little understanding of what he meant.

In October of that year, his first presidency message in the Ensign reiterated the charge[2]. Just a week after the issue came out, he spoke in conference. He again shared a similar message, encouraging us to display pictures of the temple in our homes. He also mentions the upcoming dedication of the Bountiful Temple and said, “My brothers and sisters, I testify that the impressions of the Spirit have weighed heavily upon me in considering these matters.”[3]

It turned out that nearly a million people toured the Bountiful Temple in November and December of 1994[4]. My parents had tickets for a tour on a November evening. The temple was nearly two hours away from where I attended college at Utah State University in Logan, but I decided to attend with my parents anyway. Snow was forecast for that day, but without too much worry I set off. The temple was lovely and the rooms were incredible. I remember especially the bride’s room. However, it was also very crowded, and there was no explanation provided for the purpose of the various rooms. Between the crowds and my confusion, my experience was not exactly what I had hoped for. I was not sorry I had gone, certainly, but I had not felt the spirit the way I expected. When we were done touring the temple, I went with my parents back to my home in Ogden, where they encouraged me to stay for the night. I had early classes, however, and decided to be on my way.

All started well on my journey back to my apartment, but about five minutes after entering Sardine Canyon, the snow began in earnest. Besides the snow rushing at my windshield like the Millennium Falcon rushing into hyperspace, it was very foggy. I slowed down to a crawl, not able to see more than a few feet in front of me, my headlights actually exacerbating the effects of snow and fog. I have driven that canyon literally hundreds of times in my life and I can only remember a handful of instances when conditions were that bad. I knew I was in serious trouble if I went off the road. The only shoes I had with me were the dress shoes I was wearing; my only coat, a thin dress coat. I didn’t have food or water in the car. I didn’t have a phone to call for help. I didn’t have a shovel in case digging myself out became necessary. I went at a snail’s pace for nearly ten miles. With relief, I could tell from the lay of the road that I was nearing the end of the canyon.

Whenever I drive into Cache Valley, particularly at night, the first thing I look for in the distance is the temple. It is built on a bluff just in front of the mouth of another canyon through the mountains to the east. As you enter the valley from the south, the temple stands out brightly, with its white spires illuminated bluish white every night. Though it is nearly pushed up against the east mountains, you get the impression that it actually stands on a large hill right in the center of the valley. The pioneers chose their site for the temple very well.

But that night, as I exited the canyon with 10 miles to go to my apartment just blocks from the temple, I still couldn’t see a thing. The snow had let up, but the fog was as bad as ever. My habit for getting to my apartment was to go up around the temple, even though the route took a few extra minutes, because it was a pretty drive. Despite the terrible visibility and little hope of seeing anything, I kept to my routine and drove up around the temple. I nearly ran off the road as I rounded the curve.

As if someone had turned on a switch, the temple was suddenly before me, blazingly bright and seeming to rise up out of the fog. Its parking lot was empty, covered only with a layer of fresh new snow. The quiet was intense and lovely as I pulled over carefully and just stared for several minutes, feeling the manifestation in my spirit that I had not felt inside the cozy and warm temple from the hours previous. I knew with all my heart that I wanted to be inside that sacred building, that I wanted to understand what President Hunter meant when he said that the temple should be the symbol of our membership.

But I knew something else. I knew that I was no more prepared to be in that glorious building than I was to be driving through the canyon that night.

I’m going to relate the symbols of what I was missing from my car that day to things I was also missing from my life. As I do, please carefully consider the things in your own life that may need putting in order so that we might each claim the blessings that our Father in Heaven is standing ready to give us.

1) Boots. If something had gone wrong and I had to get out of my car, I would have been wet to my nyloned knees in the ridiculous shoes I was wearing.

Just as my shoes would have allowed me to do little more than mince and slip in the snow, the faith I was exercising at that time in my life was weak and tentative. In 1997, the sesquicentennial of the pioneer’s arrival in Utah, President Hinckley narrated a remarkable documentary, shown in conference, titled Faith in Every Footstep[5]. There was a lovely hymn of the same title composed that same year to honor the anniversary[6]. In the documentary, President Hinckley and his counselors spoke with fervor and testimony about the faith of our early pioneer ancestors. They were a people who understood that faith was not just about believing, but that true faith inspires you to act, time and time again, even against overwhelming odds and challenges.

My own faith was not like this. I had not learned to trust the Lord. Despite many wonderful and subtle spiritual experiences through my teenage years, I asked time and time again for a manifestation about the truthfulness of the gospel. I was not unlike Oliver Cowdery. Even with experience after experience, Oliver still petitioned Joseph to ask the Lord to send him another witness. The Lord’s reply to Oliver’s question is loving, but there is a distinct rebuke also.

“Verily, verily, I say unto you, if you desire a further witness, cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might aknow concerning the truth of these things. Did I not speak apeace to your mind concerning the matter? What greater bwitness can you have than from God?[7]

I needed to trust the many witnesses I had received from God and move forward; taking my turn to serve others and live the religion I knew to be true. Now, true faith was the first piece of preparation, but not the only one. From the scripture just shared, we see that Oliver was admonished to greater faith by listening to and trusting the Holy Ghost. This leads me to the second thing that would have been useful.

2) I needed something to keep me warm.

This symbol should be a little more obvious. The Savior himself said just hours before his atonement, “But the aComforter, which is the bHoly Ghost, whom the Father will send in my cname, he shall dteach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.[8]

I love the word “comforter.” I think there is no better description of the way the Holy Ghost can help us to feel. In a world of turmoil and difficulty, indeed, there is no greater need than this marvelous feeling of comfort. In addition to providing feelings of comfort and peace, the Holy Ghost helps to guide and direct us in our decisions.

The importance of the Holy Ghost was a thing I did not understand when I was a teenager in the YW program. My leaders and seminary teachers always seemed so urgent about us gaining testimonies, and learning to recognize the Spirit. I just didn’t really see what the big deal was. It wasn’t until that first spring away from home when life’s major trials truly beset me for the first time that I understood why my leaders had tried so hard. Between the ages of 18 and 25, I made no fewer than eight major life decisions. Decisions that would have changed the whole course of my life and perhaps my eternity if they had been different. I don’t know how I would have done this without the influence of the Holy Ghost, or how I could have possibly had any confidence in my decisions without His powerful, guiding influence.

In a world where the philosophies of men are becoming increasingly confused with doctrines of God, it will be vital to listen to the Holy Ghost so that we might do what is right.

3) Though the events of that snowy night happened before it was common for college students to carry cell phones, a means of communication would have been a third highly useful thing to have.
The best means of communication that we have with the Lord is prayer. It can be done any time and anywhere. It can be done with much forethought or on a whim. Prayer can be formal in front of a congregation, or traveling in the car on the way to work. When we call on God in all sincerity, he will answer us. Alma the younger gave the following counsel to one of his sons:
“Yea, and acry unto God for all thy support; yea, let all thy bdoings be unto the Lord, and whithersoever thou goest let it be in the Lord; yea, let all thy cthoughts be directed unto the Lord; yea, let the affections of thy heart be placed upon the Lord forever.

“aCounsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for bgood; yea, when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the cmorning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God; and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day.[9]

4) If the worst had happened and I had been stranded in my car for any length of time, I would have gotten hungry very quickly. You know what a humbling experience it can be to fast even a few hours. Our physical body can only survive a very short time without nourishment. Our spirits are no different.

In the last few chapters written by Nephi, he talks about the importance of reading the scriptures saying, “aAngels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost; wherefore, they speak the words of Christ. Wherefore, I said unto you, bfeast upon the cwords of Christ; for behold, the words of Christ will dtell you all things what ye should do.[10]

To bring this feasting image into more modern language, in 1988, President Benson gave a talk about one of his favorite topics, the Book of Mormon. He spoke at length about the potential he saw for the book in the hands of righteous and studied church members. My favorite part of his talk is specifically to missionaries, but his words can apply to all of us.

“We need to read daily from the pages of the [Book of Mormon] that will get a man ‘nearer to God by abiding by its precepts, than by any other book.’ I challenge all of us to prayerfully consider steps that we can personally take to bring this new witness for Christ more fully into our own lives and into a world that so desperately needs it. I have a vision of thousands of missionaries going into the mission field with hundreds of passages memorized from the Book of Mormon so that they might feed the needs of a spiritually famished world.[11]

I will not ask for a raise of hands for how many of you have hundreds of passages memorized from the Book of Mormon, but it should be apparent that we have a long way to go in how carefully we are reading this most sacred book, as well as our other scriptures. It is impossible to feed others if we ourselves are spiritually famished.

5) The last useful tool to me would have been a shovel. Sometimes you just have to dig yourself out.

Regardless of how much faith a person has or how often we read the scriptures, we are all just human, and mistakes will be made. This is part of our mortal experience. However, to be prepared for partaking the Lord’s covenants whether baptism or the sacrament or the temple, we must be humble enough to continually be in a state of repentance. As I’ve learned about and studied repentance I’ve come to see that repentance is much more than being sorry for the actions you’ve committed. It is even more than attempting to make reparations for the mistakes we’ve made. And it is more than merely promising never to commit these acts again. While each of these is an important part of the process of repentance, true repentance is more akin to conversion than apologizing. It is a complete bending of our will to our Father in Heaven’s so that our hearts are changed and we have no more disposition to do evil.

A few years ago, Elder Hafen gave one of the best talks that I have ever heard on the atonement. It was titled “All for All.” He explained that Christ is willing to put all he has on the line to save us, as long as we do the same. Obviously, what He brings to the table is much greater, but he accepts our best effort as enough. He then talked about trials and sin as part of ever mortal experience. He said,

“Adam and Eve learned constantly from their often harsh experience. They knew how a troubled family feels. Think of Cain and Abel. Yet because of the Atonement, they could learn from their experience without being condemned by it. Christ’s sacrifice didn’t just erase their choices and return them to an Eden of innocence. That would be a story with no plot and no character growth. His plan is developmental—line upon line, step by step, grace for grace.
“So if you have problems in your life, don’t assume there is something wrong with you. Struggling with those problems is at the very core of life’s purpose. As we draw close to God, He will show us our weaknesses and through them make us wiser, stronger. If you’re seeing more of your weaknesses that just might mean you’re moving nearer to God, not farther away [12].”

We all have difficulties that must be worked on. It is not a punishment to correct our lives to put them more in line with our Father’s will. It is instead a great blessing. Repentance allows us to “learn from our experience without being condemned by it.”

Obviously, any of these tools: faith, the influence of the Holy Ghost, prayer, scripture study and repentance could be a topic all on its own. I use them here to merely illustrate some things that can help prepare us to enter the temple.

After the Bountiful Temple’s dedication in January of 1995, President Hunter fell very ill as cancer spread through his body. His February message in the Ensign again reiterated his urgency to get members of the church to the temple[13]. On March 3, 1995 he passed away[14], just short of nine months after being called as prophet. His prophetic tenure was brief, but his message was powerful and sank deep into the hearts of the saints worldwide.

Almost exactly a year later I went to the Logan temple to receive my own endowment in preparation to serve a mission, thinking that I had arrived at some great destination. Instead, my temple experience, even from that very first day, showed me what President Hunter meant by the temple being a symbol. The temple was not actually an end in itself; it was a preparation for entering one day into God’s presence. The temple teaches us what is necessary to return to him.

As I made covenants there and participated in ordinances, I knew I was committing myself to a lifetime of service to the Lord: the temple was a beautiful representation of all that was possible if I kept my covenants. Yet the most powerful symbol for me that day came as I joined four generations of my family in the Celestial room. I cried as the spirit filled my whole soul, truly realizing for the first time that one of the Lord’s greatest promises is that God will allow our most cherished relationships on this earth to continue into the eternities.

Fairy tales always wrap up everything nice and neat with a “happily ever after” at the end of the story. Real life, however, is not quite that neat. Our lives continue long after the highs and lows: indeed we know that our lives will continue forever and we will constantly learn and struggle and triumph along the way. Some months after my endowment, I was serving my mission in a huge country with but a single temple. President Hinckley visited that great country in 1997 to tell the people in each of the major cities he visited that they would soon have temples too. The Lord had seen the faith of his people in following the admonition to carry recommends even if they had little opportunity to go to the temple: He would bring the temples to them. The Saints wept for joy at the news and I caught the tiniest glimpse of the thousands upon thousands of Saints who had taken President Hunter’s words to heart.

Each day is a preparation for eternity. I pray that each of us will look carefully at our lives and prune away what is unnecessary and spend our time instead focused on what the Lord tells us matters the most.

I know that as we prepare to one day enter the Lord’s presence there is no better voice to follow than the prophet. I have a testimony that President Monson is a prophet today, and that the keys have been handed down, unbroken since Joseph Smith was given them more than a century and a half ago. I know the Book of Mormon is God’s work: another testament that Jesus is indeed the Christ and that he is the head of this Church. I saw these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.


[1] Jay M. Todd, “President Howard W. Hunter: Fourteenth President of the Church,” Ensign, Jul 1994, 2

[2] Howard W. Hunter, “The Great Symbol of Our Membership,” Ensign, Oct 1994, 2
[3] Howard W. Hunter, “‘Exceeding Great and Precious Promises’,” Ensign, Nov 1994, 7
[4] ”Bountiful Utah Temple Dedicated,” Ensign, Mar. 1995, 74–75
[5] “Faith in Every Footstep: The Epic Pioneer Journey,” Ensign, May 1997, 62

[6] K. Newell Dayley, “Faith in Every Footstep,” Liahona, Feb 1997, 22–23
[7] D & C 6:22-23

[8] John 14:26; note that Jesus refers to the idea of “comfort” two other times in this chapter—once in reference to the Holy Ghost (though some readings of this passage suggest that his reference to “another” comforter is in actuality a personal visitation from the Savior indicating your calling and election made sure) and the second time to his pledge not to leave the apostles “comfortless.” It is not exactly clear why, but it seems that the apostles were unable to have the full influence of the Holy Ghost while they had the Savior with them.
[9] Alma 37:36-37
[10] 2 Nephi 32:3; see also 2 Nephi 9:51 and 31:20 for more references to feasting and the scriptures written by Nephi. It should be remembered that Nephi had seen a vision of the end of the world. He knew, perhaps better than any writer in the Book of Mormon, that this record would be preserved for a people far removed from his own. He had a wonderful perspective on the importance of these scriptures, their coming forth, and what their restoration would mean for the history of mankind. In 2 Nephi 29 he talks at length about the necessity of a second witness and each time having its own scriptures. The incredible writing in that chapter shows his frustration with those who would one day reject the words he had spent his lifetime writing and protecting.
[11] Ezra Taft Benson, “Flooding the Earth with the Book of Mormon,” Ensign, Nov 1988, 4; the embedded reference is from the History of the Church 4:461 as well as the Book of Mormon’s introduction page.

[12] Bruce C. Hafen, “The Atonement: All for All,” Ensign, May 2004, 97. The embedded reference about weakness making us stronger is to Ether 12:27
[13] Howard W. Hunter, “A Temple-Motivated People,” Ensign, Feb 1995, 2
[14] “President Howard W. Hunter: The Lord’s ‘Good and Faithful Servant’,” Ensign, Apr 1995, 8