It Isn't About Politics, I Promise (Okay, It Mostly Isn't About Politics, So Just Keep Reading)

I know that my political musings--diatribes, rantings--haven't gotten a good response; that is okay. I write this blog, in part, to help clarify my thinking, which sometimes includes bouncing ideas off of others. There is much to tell as I'm still on what is beginning to seem like a very lengthy vacation, and Christmas always lends itself to great kid stories.

It has also lent itself to much family togetherness, which has been really good. (Aside: it has also really hit home this week how far away I am from family and there has been a degree of homesickness that surprised me. This will, no doubt, be a subject for a future post.) It has also meant that there is much Mitt-championing going on because members of Plantboy's family, particularly, have definitely jumped on that bandwagon. What has amazed me is the extreme sensitivity over any question of Romney's candidacy or tactics. It reminded me of a post of KimBlue's some weeks back.

She discussed a survey about viewing/listening/reading habits of conservatives and liberals. One major conclusion was that conservatives tend to avoid media that disagrees with them because it seems threatening or dangerous to their ideals. Liberals, on the other hand, observe all types of media and are more likely to have shifting opinions. I have been mired in the land of Conservatism these last two weeks.

I guess I believe that we need to stick to our guns where principles and eternal gospel truths are at stake, but if we occasionally, or even often, change our minds about the efficacy and logistics of certain practices, then perhaps this is just evidence of progression? I'm tired of being told that I've gone to the dark side because I don't believe the government's whole role should be to bomb countries with more oil than us. If the government is a reflection of its people, then what does this say about us? But you know my feelings on THIS.

I probably won't/can't say much else. My blog is being read by some suprising people who don't always leave comments until after they've read for some time, or they tell me in person. And while I'm happy about this, I am starting to see that the idea of an on-line, open journal definitely has its limits. Forecastcallsforrain told me that she loves her Dallas book club because all of the members are from different wards and the group is pretty exclusive. She says it is kind of a place to go and dump the baggage because what happens at book club stays at book club. I feel like I need a place like that.

Hm . . . . now it sounds like I'm an incurable (insufferable, incorrigible) gossip, but I'm really not. I've just got a lot rolling around in my head right now that I'd like to "talk" about, but I don't think this is quite the right forum, though there are some of you I'd like to really hash out some of this stuff with. My journal writing used to be a place I could really unload on the page; often times, by the time I'd finished writing I'd feel better, more clear-headed and and relieved from some of the emotional baggage. But blogging . . . well, it is just different. And though this is filling an important niche for me, it is not quite filling the niche I expected it to.

As I approach post #100, I need to do some re-thinking about what I'm doing here.

Mother of the Year (Alternatively Titled: And Then She Needed Her Head Examined)

I mostly love to read stories about all of your adorable kid things. Sometimes I wonder at my own motivation when I post these stories/events. While most of it is to say, "Look what we are up to?" or "Aren't the kids adorable?" But sometimes I have to say that these cutsie posts smack of "Look what a great mother I am!" And I hope that I am self-aware enough to tell you right up front that the tone of this post will lean a little bit that direction. So if you hate that sort of shameless self-promotion. STOP READING RIGHT NOW.

Okay, if you've stuck with me this far then you get to listen to me pat myself on the back. :) So the Poopy Pirate agreed enthusiastically to my birthday party idea, even though I must be nuts to allow any kind of tradition that occurs less than two weeks before Christmas. Then, brilliant STM that I am, hit on the idea to have a "Go Diego Go" party: the current love of our three-year old life. The alternative was a Thomas Party, but I've just done WAY too many of these. (Not as many as on.the.run. but enough.) Should be a piece of cake, right?

Wrong.

If there is Go Diego party paraphenelia out there then it is not for sale in our corner of The Land of Commercialism. Instead mommy basically created the party from scratch, though after four phone calls I found a bakery that could do my cake "kit." Here is a sampling--notice my fabulously coordinated blue and orange as well as my blue and orange children:


It was hard for Scallywag to understand that it wasn't actually his birthday. He was right in the thick of making the invites, decorating, welcoming the kids and (naturally) opening the booty.

Below is a picture of us playing a board game called "Go Diego." No, I did not actually purchase said game for the party, though it came in handy. How long do you think musical chairs can be played with a group of three year olds? Nope, not even that long. The game was a space filler before the pinata extravaganza. Which was Scallywag's idea. (Aside: I really wanted to get a princess or Dora pinata and take a turn of my own walking the you-know-what out of it, but I am a model of decorum.) Oh, and in the picture below, that is me on the left. This is the only shot you'll see of me. Plantboy took some video from the party which apparently primarily involved getting three minutes of my hiney. Not posted.

This is a bean bag toss game, only you don't throw bean bags through holes. Or even bean bags for that matter. What you do is take some of Captain Tootypants' soft blocks and throw them as hard as you can at pictures of diego and the animals he is rescuing. For stickers.

Now for the part where mommy needs her head examined.

After the party (and waiting for the parent who thinks the party ends 30 minutes later than it actually did), I had to drive all over the neighborhood because I have started an early morning paper route. How early you must be asking? There has hardly been a day in the last month that I've gotten out of bed later than THREE AM. I am NOT making this up. Anyway, I was having a couple of route troubles so I drove all over making sure that I had my house numbers correct when I could actually see them. The paper route will, no doubt, one day be a very charming post all on its own, so I will refrain from further comment here.

Then I went to Staples where I picked up the copy of my book that I made to give to my mother. I did a very ruthless edit and am extremely happy with this (temporarily anyway) final version. I still think that unless you read more than the first three chapters you aren't sure if you're sold on it, so I may try another publisher that looks more at an entire manuscript (or at least says they do). My plan is to send it off again in January.

I came home just in time to realize that I had signed up weeks before to feed our missionaries, which I do every month, but I'm never consistent about the day or the week so it is always a complete shock when they call. I noted with some smugness that sister missionaries are more considerate about calling at least a couple of days in advance. Elders . . . . .

So last Saturday was a very long day. Perhaps not as long as this coming Saturday wherein we will load three kids in the car at three am and hope to make Ogden in 13 hours.

Last two items (I know, I know, I've got to get the pics off my camera more often):

We've had our Christmas on for about a month now, but I had to post a picture of my Christmas tree. I bought it at a garage sale in Champions Forest because the family had three others (my TX friends will appreciate that tidbit). We were traveling that year and a tree was not in the budget. Neither were presents. Neither was the traveling. Anyway, it was late afternoon when I stopped on a whim at the garage sale. How much did she want for this seven foot beauty covered with seven strands of white lights? FIVE DOLLARS.

Um . . . sold?

Anyway, nearly all of the ornaments are homemade and we add a few each year. This year it is clothespin angels that my neighbor taught me how to make. It is a little bright, bold, silly and just so darn homey. We love our tree. I think Plantboy would love to do the lumberjack thing and get the boys out in the woods to pick their own, but I remind him how environmental this is: we reduce because we don't get a new one every year, we reuse this one and we recycled it from somebody else. So we are having a green Christmas in at least one respect.

Almost ready to wrap up, promise. Here is the baby who slept like an angel all through the Diego Melee, but has been a little devil over the last 48 hours with an icky fever and more snot and drool than I've ever seen even come from a BIG person.

My last item is just such a funny kid thing that you will definitely be rewarded if you have made it this far. Yesterday afternoon, Pirate dragged out the dinosaurs that haven't been played with for months. He began making up names for them and acting very silly. He began calling this dinosaur the yee-horse. I have no idea why.

Anyway, Scallywag got after Pirate for making up "dumb" stuff. Right, because Scallywag isn't full of it. Anyway, it turns out that the yee-horse can fly. Well, this was even more dumb in Scallywag's book, but when he saw what fun Pirate was having, he promptly picked up the other yee-horse, who is pink and apparently the female.

I'm not sure what these two yee-horses are doing:

But this is their baby, who is still learning to fly.

Looking for Love

I really need to post pictures from our 3rd birthday Diego party extravaganza, but maybe tomorrow.

Instead, a funny story and two great videos.

Scallywag Plankwalker has, for some odd reason, been interested in finding a wife (he sometimes calls her "mother") lately. The Poopy Pirate was given a puzzle-map of the United States for his birthday and Scallywag is fascinated by it. He is constantly asking to put it together and wants me to tell him the names of the states. The other night he was running his finger around the map and said to Plantboy, "Yep, somewhere around here I'm going to travel to find my little lady."

"Little lady, huh?"

"Yep, a little lady to get married to."

Today, as he looked at the map (as well as a world map we found on-line) he said, "I'm going to go to Brazil to find my little lady. Then, we will move back to Oregon. After our first baby we'll go to Texas. Then, after our second baby we'll got to West Virginia. After our third baby then we'll move to Canada. After all that, we'll get on a boat and go to Hawaii."

"To live?"

"No. For our first vacation." After all that, he's going to need one.

A nomad in training.

Here are the videos. I subbed RS in church on Friday. I pretty much had to fight the ugly cry during the entire lesson. The topic was on missionary work and it just happens to be ten years ago this week that I came home from the Great South Land. Besides feeling really old, teaching this lesson just reminded me for the umpteenth time how much I loved those people and how much serving a mission blessed my life. I showed the link in the lesson because President Kimball said that righteous members were "the best advertisement for the Church."

This link is to the story explaining the origin of the ad campaign. I've also linked the summary of the comencement given by Elder Ballard at BYU-Hawaii last week is reported on; his remarks go along so beautifully with his conference talk.

As I watch these commercials and it is like the Church has grown up. I'm not sure if can really explain that? It is like the Church is getting ready for another great round of converts or something. I hope I can do my part; I pray daily that I'll raise my sons to do theirs.

Worthy To Suffer Shame

In a post comment a few days back, I indicated that there was NO WAY I would vote for Mr. Huckabee because he had once been a Baptist minister. After posting the comment, I realized that this is as narrow-minded as the NPR piece that got my back up to begin with. So, for a few days I tried to find out more about Huckabee (do we really want a president with such a last name?), and I was actually quite liking some of his ideas. Then, a couple of days ago, this story came across my home page.

I was like

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

While, strictly speaking, this is correct theology we are dealing with here, but I've only heard this statement worded precisely so when speaking with a person quoting anti-Mormon literature. The only political leverage to be gained from such a statement is an attempt to paint Romney as a member of cult and thereby undermine his support among conservative Christians. Such personal attacks on a person's religious belief can have NO bearing whatever on any rational approach to politics.

I am about four months behind in my Sunday School lessons, and I was just reading Acts 5 the other day: one of my favorites in the whole New Testament (actually the first SEVEN chapters of The Acts are such affirmation for LDS theology that you have to wonder how the early Christians fell apart so quickly). Two of my favorite all time verses are found here.

The first is about Peter. The apostles are brought before a council and critisized all around for preaching Jesus. The high priest believes the apostles are only preaching about him in an attempt to pin his murder on them. Peter insists that no, his only desire is to witness about Jesus' life and resurrection so that people will feel the spirit and become saved. Despite wanting to kill him, they really have nothing on Peter and the apostles and they are released. Then, Luke records the following, "And they departed from the presence of the council, rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer shame for his name."

I don't agree with Mr. Romney's politics, though I think there are certainly WORSE choices on the ballot (particularly the Republican ballot). But I have had a lot of empathy for him the last couple of weeks. I too have suffered shame for His name, and in the moment I have never felt cause to rejoice. I mostly felt hurt and confused and that I had been treated unfairly. Mostly I felt that I had cast my pearls before swine. . . .

I wonder if Mr. Romney is feeling any of these emotions this week? I pray that he will one day look back on his (short-lived?) run at the White House and feel joy that he was willing to suffer shame to stick to his beliefs. It takes true courage to stand up in the face of so much opposition.

The next part of this same chapter that I love has also been on my mind. And perhaps this is the greater message to the world in response to the way Mr. Romney has been treated. The reason the apostles were even released is because of a man referred to as a "doctor in the law" called Gamliel speaks in favor of amnesty, using an example from an earlier event in the city and then saying the following:

" . . . Refrain from these men, and let them alone: for if this counsel or this work be of men, it will come to nought: But if it be of God, ye cannot overthrow it; lest haply ye be found even to fight against God."

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is just ONE generation away from its bicentennial. It is truly the stone cut out of the mountain prophesied by Daniel in ancient times. The world may rage against its doctrine and try to lure its adherents away into false paths, but the church will grow. "As well a man might stretch forth his puny arm to stop the Missouri river in its decreed course, or to turn it up stream, as to hinder the Almight from pouring down knowledge from heaven upon the heads of the Latter-day Saints." Those who have disparaged, criticized, born false witness against, or treated lightly the sacred things of the Church will one day know that they were mistaken. And only an infinitely loving Father in Heaven will be able to give them a second chance.

I know that Elohim and Jehovah appeared together, united but unique, to Joseph Smith that day in the grove. I know it. In the years after, I know they directed Joseph into forming a church. Not a reformed church. Not a protestant church. A RESTORED Church. A Church based on truth and modern prophetic revelation, not on assumption and dead philosphy. That prophetic line has not been broken even to this day. Anybody can know this for themselves. Anybody can read and pray and ponder and know if they will pray with a sincere heart.

If Mr. Romney's bid for candidacy does no more than genuinely interest some few who are seeking to know truth, then it will be worth all of his time and effort and money and pain.

As Promised! The Chastity Talk

Fireside Talk:

This is excerpted/paraphrased. My original remarks were about 50 minutes long. The theme was from D & C 121:45 "Let Virtue Garnish Thy Thoughts Unceasingly," which is the YM/YW theme for 2007.

I began by showing them pictures of myself in junior high and high school and spoke about trying to reinvent myself every year because I kept thinking that I'd have more confidence if I could just alter aspects of myself that I hated. These were mostly superficial things. Clothes, hair make-up, peer groups, etc. The kids, obviously got a real kick out of my late-eighties, early nineties attire and hair disasters. I'll pick up here:

"And while I was figuring out a lot about myself, there were still things that just didn't seem quite right. There was this boy that I really was crazy about who never saw me as anything more than a friend. I never quite got the grades I really craved. I never was the lead in the play. I never made student office. Even during my senior year, as I learned what I was good at and had lots of friends, I could never quite get rid of my inner turmoil.

"All this time I had attended seminary and church regularly. I knew a lot about the Church. I had felt the spirit many times and even borne my testimony, but I frequently doubted the truth of the gospel and often mistrusted my feelings.

"This is my state of mind when I got to college. And although I was thrilled to move out and be on my own, I was overwhelmed with the number of freshmen girls at my university. They all seemed just like me! I felt kind of adrift and without identity. And for the first time, I was very closely exposed to students who did not keep the commandments, or even pretend to. I

"Then during my freshman year of college, a series of a terrible and unrelated events happened, all of them within just a couple of months of each other." My freshman year was pretty bad--friends having terrible accidents or cancer, a brother with an emergency surgery, an aunt who died of cancer at age 34, leaving behind four young children. . . you get the picture.

"Up to that point, I’d had very few trials and I felt like my life was crashing down around my ears. And for the first time in my life I had to know if the gospel was true. I had to know if families were eternal, or if the whole temple marriage thing was just a nice fairy tale we told ourselves to feel better about death. I had to know that there was a purpose to trial and suffering and difficulty. I had to know there was a reason to keep the commandments and be righteous, when I was surrounded by those who seemed to have a lot more fun by not doing these things.

"So I did the things I’d been taught. I prayed and studied the scriptures. I read stories from the life of the Savior and tried to learn who He was so I could begin to understand what He had done for me, and what He meant to me. I worked hard on being a good daughter and good friend. And then one day, I knew. I still remember the chair I was sitting in and the passage of the book I was reading when it hit me. I knew that Jesus had died for me, a poor, struggling college student who had no idea what terrible thing would happen next to someone I loved. Once this knowledge flooded me, the other pieces of the gospel fell into place and I knew that our trials had purpose and that families were eternal. I didn’t doubt any more, and I began keeping the commandments because I wanted to.

"And I learned one of the most important lessons of my life: confidence does not come from changing your outward appearance or your friends or from always saying the right thing, though the world will tell us this is the exact formula. But this prideful sense of self-esteem is just Satan’s counterfeit for true confidence.

"True confidence is something else entirely. True confidence is trusting the Lord so completely that our testimonies do not falter even when the storms of life beset us. True confidence is having our thoughts so in tune with the Lord that the Spirit is our constant companion in the face of every difficulty, temptation and trial. "

We then discussed the scriptural theme for the year and talked about the terrible circumstances under which Joseph was given this revelation. I told them that I loved this scripture for its built in promise about having confidence. My whole life I'd fought so hard to have confidence, but the formula was there in the scriptures all along. This, incidentally, is the only time in the scriptures that the word "confidence is used."

"True confidence . . . has nothing to do with how we dress or look or act, it has everything to do with how much faith we exercise.

"So though I’ve spent most of our time here tonight focusing on this remarkable promise of confidence in the presence of the Lord, I’d like to take some more time now on the virtue part."

We then discussed the 13th Article of Faith and how it uses the term virtue in two different contexts. "The first time it comes in a list of other good attributes. So our first working definition is that virtue is a particular attribute, a Christlike attribute, that is desirous to have. The second time it is used, it gives the impression that all of these things can be considered virtuous, so that virtue can also be a general category of good things.

"Some years back President Hinckley wrote a book that spent a couple of weeks on the New York Times bestseller list. This book may look familiar to some of you. Now you are probably all too young to have been aware when this came out, but if your parents have a copy of this book, you should read it. The book is called Standing for Something: 10 Neglected Virtues That Will Heal Our Hearts and Homes."

The kids came up with as many virtues as they could. I mentioned that although they were all good, we wanted to emphasize, "chapter three of his book called, 'Making a Case for Morality, in which he uses the words morality, chastity and virtue interchangeably. So while virtue is being generally a good person, virtue is, specifically, keeping the Lord’s law of chastity. Just so there is no question about what this law is, I’m going to quote directly from For the Strength of Youth 'Physical Intimacy between husband and wife is beautiful and sacred. It is ordained of God for the creation of children and for the expression of love between husband and wife. God has commanded that sexual intimacy be reserved for marriage.'

"I think it is important to point out here that the term “sexual intimacy” is used, which is more encompassing than if just the word “sex” is used. If you have any questions about behaviors and whether or not they are appropriate, you should read the rest of this section as well as the section on chastity in 'True to the Faith." Or talk to your parents and leaders and bishop. And if you are behaving in any way in reference to the opposite sex that even raises a question in your mind of whether or not it is appropriate, then stop what you are doing immediately.

"I want to quote somewhat at length from President Hinckley’s book here. I am also going to have several of you read quotes from his book as well as a talk that was given in October Conference 1998 by Jeffrey R. Holland, which I first heard when my husband and I were dating. I quote liberally from the prophets here because their words, while being plain and unapologetic about our standards, are also filled with love and authority."

The kids read several excerpts which I will not quote here--you really should read both the chapter and the talk in their complete form. EXCELLENT stuff.

"I know it is hard. I know it. About a year before going on my mission, I committed myself to the Lord one night in my prayers, promising that by my 21st birthday I would be ready and worthy to go to the temple—whether to be married or to go on a mission would be up to Him, but I would be ready.

"I was so grateful for my commitment. Just weeks after making this promise, I was tested in this very principle. I came to the moment of decision, and if I had not decided before-hand and made that firm commitment of worthiness to the Lord, I would never have had the strength to make up my mind in that instant. And if I had not made the right decision, I would have regretted it for months, and maybe years after.

"Because it wasn’t marriage that happened for me first; it was a mission. The confidence I took with me on my mission, true confidence based on the Lord’s requirements, was one of my most valuable possessions. Only perfect trust in the Lord could have compelled me to knock on doors, day after day, week after week and share the gospel message. And even after thousands and thousands of rejections, my testimony, my faith and my confidence only grew. I saw an elder on the last day of his mission knock on a door and say with absolute steadiness, 'Sir, I am here on your doorstep because the Lord wants to call you to repentance. Will you listen to our message?' The man did listen. Only perfect purity of heart can give you enough faith to say such a thing to a perfect stranger.

"Now, I know that you are exposed to things so much worse and more shocking than what I was exposed to as a teenager, but I also know--I know--that you were saved to come to earth for this time because you are the very best the Lord has. Many of you sitting in this very room no doubt sat at the knee of our Father in Heaven before you ever came to this earth and solemnly promised to do all in your power to overcome temptation and return to Him. There is nothing the world has to offer that is greater than the Kingdom of Heaven. Nothing.

"Satan knows this. And I hate to even bring up his name. I hate to even give him mention in a place that should uplift and edify. But he is so real. He knows you are the best of the best. It is nothing for him to claim a soul that is already on its way down to hell, but if he can claim one of YOU for his own—one of God’s own elite—then he laughs and laughs as he watches you surrender your agency to your passions, as he watches you surrender your body to one who will break your heart and surrender your soul to himself, so he can enslave you.

"I’d like to take a moment to address the boys.

"I’ve never had a teenage son, nor have I been a teenage boy. But I have taught hundreds of middle and high schoolers over the last several years and I have three sons of my own. I think I know a little bit about how boys tick. You hear talks time and time again about the evils of pornography. But even with the repetition, I don’t think the warning can be repeated often enough. There is nothing in our society that will give you a more perverse idea of relationships between men and women. There is nothing that will lead you to objectify and distort the truth about love and intimacy as much as pornography. It will poison your mind and heart and spirit. And if doesn’t even have to be hard pornography found in certain places on the internet. Any television program, song or commercial that treats women as objects to satisfy desire is unworthy of a priesthood holder’s time and attention; even a moment is too much if it seeks to cheapen things that are sacred. If you do date, date in groups. If you date alone, specify a start and ending time to the date. Bring her home early. Whatever you do, PLAN activities for your dates. There is nothing more flattering to a young woman than to know her date has cared enough about her to plan something to do. If you are in a place where your guy and girl friends are doing nothing more than hanging out or, worst case scenario, watching a movie in the dark, then have the courage to be like Joseph of Egypt and FLEE. Have the courage to date girls who are keeping gospel standards, even if it means you may not get a goodnight kiss. Have the courage to tell a young woman who is dressed modestly how pretty she looks and how proud you are to be seen with her.

"Now the boys can tune out while I address the girls.

"You young sisters have more power over the young men than even they will dare admit. If you would one day have strong marriages and worthy priesthood holders leading your families, you must not do anything that would jeopardize the young men you associate with—either the young men you date, or the young men you are friends with—from going on missions. On their missions they will learn the true nature of love and sacrifice; they will return home ready to settle and commit and lead. The way you speak, the way you dress, the way you walk, has a huge influence on any young man in your vicinity. Using your words and your body to tease, tempt and control is the cruelest use of the powerful gifts God has given to you. Do not wear clothes that are so tight your straps underneath can be seen; do not sit on a guy’s lap, even if he is just a friend; do not give back rubs; do not wear dresses that creep up your legs and shirts that creep up your bellies. Try clothes on until you find the ones that fit you properly so they are not too tight or too sloppy. But most of all, do not explain away such behavior. Rationalization is no substitute for quiet dignity and modesty. Nobody should ever have to look at you and wonder if you are LDS.

"And while many of these things, on their own, are not direct violations of the Law of Chastity, I have seen every single one of them lead to things that are.

"In the Book of Mormon, Alma gives some advice to each of his sons before he dies. He says to one of them, 'Bridle all of your passions that you may be filled with love.' The world would have us believe that expressing your passion is the equivalence of expressing your love. But the Lord’s way is the higher way, and he says that expressing our passion is absolutely NOT love: it is keeping our passion under control so that we might have time to learn and develop true Christlike love instead of just giving in to our selfish desires.

"When I knelt across the altar from my husband eight and a half years ago, surrounded by family and friends in that beautiful sealing room in the Logan temple, I knew that we were worthy to be there. I knew that any price I had paid in self control was worth it for that moment and for the eternity we would have together, and the children that would be born to us. On that day, I began to understand what it means to really be 'in love.' I testify to you this day, that keeping your thoughts clean and pure and virtuous is WORTH IT. Whatever sacrifice you think you are making to get your life in order is NOTHING compared to the blessings the Lord is waiting to give to you when you approach him with clean hands and a pure heart.

I concluded by sharing two stories: the first of a girl I had grown up with who allowed herself be led away, and the second of a remarkable young man I taught on my mission.

After sharing the story of the young woman, who, after a series of terrible choices, ended up pregnant by age 16, I said, "Not long ago I heard about her, though my parents have since moved from that neighborhood. She is renting the home she grew up in from her parents who have moved away. She has several children now from at least two different fathers and has been divorced a couple of times. Her unwillingness to keep her thoughts and actions pure has caused her to have a life that is difficult and no doubt, filled with a large measure of sorrow. At what point could she have turned things around?"

There was some discussion about the right time to make good choices, and then one especially perceptive Priest said, "Now!"

"That is right. At any point she wanted to. The Savior’s atonement is real and powerful. At any moment, even now, that she decides her life is not what she wants it to be and she desires to repent, she can begin the long process back toward the light. Any one of you sitting her tonight has the same promise extended. If there is anything in your life that needs changing, do it now! The Lord is waiting to help you overcome your sin and to bless you anew with the power of His Spirit. You just have to take a single step in the right direction. I shared her story because I don't think any dicussion of chastity can be made without reference to repentance."

I then shared a story of one of the most remarkable young men I've ever met, Peter, and shared his conversion story I was pleased to witness during my mission. The central pont was that, "Peter did not have a single thing in his life when we met him that would give him anything the world termed confidence.

"Still, even before joining the church, the strength of Peter’s spirit shone through and he was a young man of integrity. A year or two previous he had made a commitment to himself not to drink or smoke as well as a decision to live the law of chastity. While this may not seem too remarkable to you, growing up in the church and being trained to make these commitments from your early childhood, but to a young man growing up in Australia! Such a commitment outside the church is hardly ever heard of.

"After his baptism, Peter glowed with such a light that he found himself a white shirt and tie at the thrift shop and was out door knocking with our district leader before he had even been a member for a month. Our district leader said that Peter was more bold at the doors than even he and his companion and his strength of spirit and pure testimony had given them teaching opportunities they wouldn’t have otherwise had.

"Peter’s journey hasn’t always gone as smoothly as those first several weeks, but he has endured. Just over a year ago, he and his wife were sealed together in the Sydney Temple. Now, if Peter will stay true to the covenants he made both at baptism and in the temple, keeping his thoughts and actions clean before the Lord, then he will be able to be the husband and father that his own dad was not. He will be walk with confidence when confronting any situation because his life is right with the Lord."

I closed with my testimony of the divinity of the soul and the Lord's love for each of us, urging the kids to find out for themselves who they really are and to gain a testimony so that resisting temptation will not be as hard.

I think it went over pretty well. The leaders liked it and the kids are all still speaking to me.

Is There Anything This Cute At Your House?

Because Mormons Are Defensive, and Clannish

I listened to this story yesterday on NPR and then came straight home and sent the following email to NPR. (If you click on the link you only have to listen to the first two minutes or so to find out what prompted my reply.)

As an member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I found Michelle Norris' Monday interview with Pastor Mike Rose on Monday offensive to my faith and irrelevant to any pertinent and thinking discussion of politics. It is true that members of the LDS church do not consider themselves Protestant Christians, but it doesn't follow that we aren't Christians. As the fastest growing church in North America, it is no wonder that pastors and ministers of other faiths have spent decades attempting to spread misinformation about our faith in attempt to prevent their congregants from opening their minds to further possibilities. However, all religious discussion aside, Pastor Rose was unable to give a single argument against Mr. Romney other than his Mormonism. His remarks made it seem as though a vote for Mr. Romney is tantamount to accepting the tenets of the LDS faith. Pastor Rose's evidence of conservative Christians in Iowa being uneasy about Mr. Romney was merely anecdotal and not at all specific. While he attempted to sound as though he was paraphrasing the opinions of others, it is plain that Pastor Rose used the interview to spread his own belief that Mormonism is a "cult." (A term used three or four different times in the piece, while protesting a desire to belittle anyone else's belief.)

There are thousands of conservative, Christian, Mormons living in Iowa. I am sure that any one of them would have been happy to present another side to a radio station that is usually so careful to truly understand the issues. If Ms. Norris was concerned about getting a biased view by interviewing Latter-Day Saints, then she should reference several great articles written by Jan Shipps, a prominent LDS scholar, who is actually not a Mormon herself. Her work is well respected by many both inside and outside of the Church, and she has a very concise way of helping curious on-lookers to understand a very interesting, and popular, subculture of American life.

Unfortunately, Ms. Norris' piece on Iowa's conservative Christians did very little to help us understand what is really going on in the state, and gave platform to the religious bigotry that members of the LDS church have tried for nearly 200 years to get past.

Thanks for your time,

Elastic Waistband Lady Had a Point

Don't worry, you'll all get the chastity talk, I just haven't modified it to this format yet.


The comments in my last blog really became a political discussion of sorts. I was a bit dismissive of Chavez as any kind of a real threat to the US. Then I read this today. Scary stuff, along the lines of the "if you aren't with us then you are against us" rhetoric I so love.


I guess we are getting oil from one more enemy. What is it with dictators and statues? Or in this case, balloons? Think pyramids. The ultimate diva fit, I guess. What do you call a he-diva?



In an unrelated bit of news. I just finished reading my favorite Christmas book. This has become a nearly annual after Thanksgiving read for me. It is just so cozy.

Because I Haven't Blogged For a Week . . .

This will be another random collection of musings. But what juicy tidbit is compelling me the very most to stay to stay up past my bedtime to blog?

I was in my car tonight listening to NPR for the first time in a week and nearly swerved off the road for joy at this bit of news I only learned of today. I called my husband immediately to tell him. He had, of course, known for days. Then I thought, "Who else can I call?" The answer was a resounding NOBODY. I am sure that I only know a handful of people who think Gore's Peace Prize is as fantastically ironic as I do. I am sure that most people I know and love and regularly associate with not only didn't see his movie, but had no desire to on some kind of moral high ground. (Explain THAT to me, will you?)

I have to admit: I'm a big fan of Al Gore. I hated the way he ran the last few weeks of his presidential campaign, which probably cost him the election, but even in ultra-red Texas I voted for him, fully knowing it was an irrelevant vote. Oh, he is probably a hypocrite. I guess in that respect we all are, but I think he has been able to accomplish so much more not being president. Even if not Iraq, he would have no doubt been mired in a slough of Mid-east issues, and while he would not have declared war on the environment or appointed an oil (wo)man to be head of the EPA , there is no question that all issues green would have been put on the back burner. Love him or leave him, there is no doubt that he has influenced the thinking of a lot of powerful people (Dubya, naturally, excepted. His influence requires that powerful people also be thinking people . . . .)

Okay, onto my holiday news.

Interesting Thanksgiving. We spent it with a family who have all boys like us--but they have FIVE of them. The two wildest are the same age as my little guys and by the time we left, their two had my two so stirred up that all they wanted was to go to bed early, sleep late, stay home and get along with one another all day. Still, we were grateful for a place to go and the couple is very cool; they would be fun to hang out with. If, and I really stress "if" the kids are not in the mix. I promise, I was really missing my favorite Thanksgiving--when Forecast cooked the turkey upside down. I think on.the.run was there, and maybe Desmama?



Here are my pies: Chocolate cream, coconut cream and apple. This was not the lead story because I did not make my own crust this time. Still, they were delicious and my homemade custardy cream filling in the chocolate and the coconut was a.thing.of.beauty.



In my last post I listed some of my favorite toys and I said "IPod." I had to post a picture of it because it is so cute. If you have an IPod, you have to go to IFrogz.com, and check out their selection of covers. (Good gifty idea too.) Not only are they adorable, custom, and selling through the coolest website I've ever seen, they are also made right in good old L****, so you are buying local.



Over the long weekend, the baby got fatter, Scallywag practiced letters with Q-Tips, and Plantboy built a fort that the kids loved, but prevented me from getting into my dresser. My mom used to always say with this really hilarious sigh, "It is good enough for a mother." I'm starting to see what she meant. Scallywag also loved his cowboy-Indian vest (his term; he calls the Ewoks from Star Wars "Indian-bears."), but I couldn't get Pirate to wear his long enough to get his picture taken. Hmm . . . sounds like Halloween.

I rounded off the weekend by doing a fireside for the YM and YW in our ward. This was very nerve-wracking. I committed to do it before I found out the topic, which, of course, turned out to be chastity. Nice. That is the last time I agree before I hear the topic. I was bold and blunt, but I think I spoke with a lot of love and encouragement also. My talk was 45 minutes, so much too lengthy to include here, but Plantboy said I had to save it to read to our children one day. After I read one especially specific section to him, he said, "I wish somebody had said this to me as a teenager, but I have to tell you, there is nothing you could offer me that would compel me to stand in front of a group of young men and young women and say that." I guess I know who is giving our boys the sex talk.

Oh, and Poopy Pirate is hilarious.

I Feel Loved

Kim Blue tagged me the other day. I 've never been tagged before and, well, it is a really good ego stroke. So here goes . . . . Oh, and I added one of my own at the end. The other disclaimer is that my lists are certainly not prioritized.

Five things I Was Doing Ten Years Ago
1. I was stagnating (and getting really comfortable) in an area on my mission that I'd been in for five months, but only had a month to go on my mission so I didn't think I'd get into the last transfer. So, of course, I was transferred almost exactly ten years ago this week.
2. Tracting
3. Tracting
4. Sweating
5. And more tracting. (2, 3, and 5 could describe the way I spent a good chunk of every day--up to ten hours--for about 16 months.)

Five things on my To Do List
(I took this to mean my life time to do list--much more exciting than my daily, which I'm sure is hardly different than your own.)

1. Skydive
2. Zipline across part of the rainforest in Central America
3. Get (at least) a master's degree
4. Spend an extended holiday in New Zealand
5. Serve a mission with my husband

Five things I'd do if I was a Millionaire
(A million doesn't buy what it used to; I probably should say, I'd retire to Montana and build a fallout shelter on my family farm. . . after I'd paid my tithing, of course)

1. Pay cash for a house with four bedrooms, a small living room and den, a laundry room, a garden tub in the master bathroom, towel racks, built in book shelves, and LOTS of closet space. 2. Spend three months touring the South Pacific--Fiji, Samoa, New Zealand
3. Go back to school
4. Have or adopt another baby
5. Buy a brand new mini-van

I like to say I'd donate bunch, too, like everyone else always says. I like to think I'd donate what was left over . . . maybe I should donate first. Of course, if I didn't have a house or a car payment, then I could afford to donate every month. Hmm. . .

Five Things I'd Never Do Again
(This is tricky. Never is a long time. There are things I'd LIKE to say I'd never do again, but I just have to be honest with myself, so here is the list of things that are easier to commit to.)

1. Move before my house was sold (I hope I never have to do this again)
2. Leave a rude comment on somebody's blog (don't ask)
3. Have a white kitchen
4. Peg my jeans, or wear skinny jeans (since I'll never be skinny again)
5. Collect anothers year's worth of National Geographic (Plantboy and I have had to have a very serious conversation about this.)

Five Favorite Toys
1. IPod
2. Skis
3. Rollerblades and jogging stroller (especially my single jogger, which I don't use much these days; and this counts as one item because I use them together)
4. Computer
5. Baby backpack

Five Things I've Read Recently
(I added this one; I couldn't resist)

1. The New Yorker
2. Northanger Abbey
3. Eats, Shoots and Leaves
4. Child of the Prophecy
5. November Ensign

Five People I'm Tagging

1. Amy Jane

2. Karate Mommy

3. Desmama

4. on.the.run

5. Zippity-do-dah

The Wealth Gap

A couple of weeks back I posted about an radio broadcast I heard by Dr. Stephen Bezruschka. I haven't been able to get some of his ideas out of my head, but the last comment on the post, by Christie, really got me thinking. Then, today, I read this story about Warren Buffet, whom I have enormous respect for. I think that he and Bill and Melinda Gates have done as much for Africa as the rest of our country combined. Anyway, my recent thoughts and the article I read today have prompted this post.

Years ago President Benson gave a very (now) famous quote about howChrist takes the slums out of the people and then the people take themselves out of the slums. This quote was given in a First Presidency message in the 1989 Ensign. I have always really loved this idea. I think this is why Bezrushka's essays/broadcasts are so appealling to me. For all of his policy arguments, underneath it all he emphasized that, as Americans in particular, we have gotten so good at trying to accumulate wealth that we have completely forgotten one another. As I listened/read to more of Dr. Bezruchka's work, what he is saying at the heart of it is that many social ills are effectively a product of our poor treatment of others and the breakdown of the family. He says that we need to strive more to love others and desire true equality. He follows up by saying that true equality can only happen if young children are given all the love and the support they need by a caregiver who is consistent and is available to them later in life.

So, in a philisophical sense, his ideas are not too far from President Benson's. They are both supporting the idea that true social change needs to take place in the heart and the mind before it can be affected on a grand scale.

The difference, of course, is that President Benson is right when he says that only Christ can affect this change in our hearts for good. Dr. Bezruchka advocates government intervention. I don't think the good doctor is suggesting any kind of an anarchist overthrow, but I think he wants people to change their mindset about the way they vote. Now he isn't necessarily saying we have to give all we have to the government (though he cites historically much higher taxes as a time in our country when healthcare wasn't so complicated and the division of assets was more equitable), but he is saying that if the government reallocated resources to be good for children--as much as a year paid time off for one or both parents of new babies, schools, pre-natal care and education for single mothers, etc. . . then we wouldn't spend so much on the other end--health care (especially mental health), prisons, welfare, etc. Because, he maintains, the foundation for our lives is so fundamentally laid in those years before we ever attend school, that there are very few who break the cycle of poverty and violence and lack of nurturing. These things lead to all kinds of health issues . . . and so on.

I'm not suggesting expensive government programs to take care of all of its citizens. Really. Our government shows, generation after generation, that few government programs are succesful at accomplishing what they were designed to do. But there are scriputral lessons from history that are illustrative here. Let's look at the hallmarks of a Zion Society. All things in common. No poor among them. And while I'm not anxious for the government to be big brother (too many countries have shown the ineffectiveness of THATsocial policy), we do need to remember that one day the Lord will expect us to cheerfully consecrate all we have to the church and then use our talents to bless others. Isn't the best government really a socialist theocracy? This is so the opposite of capitalist democracy that it isn't even funny.

I read an article once put out by FARMS written by Hugh Nibley some years back. He was talking about lessons learned from the Book of Mormon, even after forty years of the initial Book of Mormon class he taught at BYU. I'm going to quote it liberally here,

"Less than a month ago I gave students in the Book of Mormon class the choice of writing a term paper on either a religious or economic theme. Ninety-four percent of the class chose the theme, "Discuss the problem of riches in the Book of Mormon. " Almost every scholar began by evoking the sacred cliche; there is nothing wrong with wealth itself; wealth as such is good. It is only how you use it that may be bad. They insisted that a free market was the perfect and flawless order of things, the ordained sanction of free agency. It is only when the system is abused that things go wrong and that in itself proves that it is good in itself.

"How do we escape abuses . . . In the Book of Mormon, the destructive power of wealth is pervasive and inespacable, since, as Helaman discovered, we can always count on humanity to do foolish things. The question is, what economic system would suit such people? The Book of Mormon answer is clear; None that they could devise. . . have we any assurance that we, whom the book is designed to warn against that very folly, are doing any better? Christ gave them the economic system by which they lived happily for a far longer peroid than any of the brief boom-cycles enjoyed by the Nephites. And we know what he taught; should that not suffice? Should not 4th Nephi put an end to all argument and sophistry? If we want answers, here they are. Yet, strangely, for Momons this is off limits and out of bounds--so long ago and far away. But the purpose of the Book of Mormon is to make all things present to us; it has been edited to delete anything not relevant to our condition. It makes no difference where or in which dispensation we live, all are tested equally. And now the Book of Mormon is holding up the mirror up to our ugliness--no wonder we look the other way as it pleads with us, "O be wise! What more can [we]say?'

"The two pasages which the student choose to score their point are anything but a brief for riches if we read them with care. They were highly favored by the class because out of more than sixty statments on the seeking of wealth in the Book of Mormon, there are virtually the only ones that can be interpreted as giving countenance to the profit motive. The first of these is in Jacob 2:18-19: 'But before yeseek for riches, seek ye for the kingdom of God. And after ye have obtained a hope in Christ, ye shall obtain riches if ye seek them. 'That is great favorite.
"It is standard practice to stop there and leave it at that, but even if we go no further, the plain lesson of this injunction is to seek the kingom of God first of all. And how do we build up the kingdom of God and establish Zion? By obeserving and keeping the law of consecration. What does that mean? The preceding verse, routinely overlooked, explains: 'Think of your brethren like unto yourselves,and be familar with all and free with our substance that they may be rich like unto you.' That looks suspiciously like equalizing thewealth--this is with reference to 'substance'; you cannot get out of it by saying you will make them 'spiritually rich.' We give to the poor enough to make us feel virtuous and keep them on the the leash, but the order here is for a basic redistrubition of wealth . . . ."

Okay, that is enough, and Nibley was certainly no prophet or even general authority, but his scholarship raises some interesting questions. He goes on at length about equality and the scriptural ideas espoused in the Lord's prayer ('thy kingdom come . . .') and cancellation of debt, one man not 'possessing' above another, not opressing the hireling in his wages, etc. He is critical of the students' citing of wealthy Mormons who have made large donations. Why? Because don't they have their reward when their giving is public? And have they given away so much that they are equal? Again, I'm not saying that Dr. Bezrushka necessarily has it all figured out, but I don't know if the modern manifestation of the "American Dream" necessarily fits in perfectly with God's plan either. It is easy to feel poor and desirous to have more and more when we live in such a consumer driven society. Maybe what Nibley and Benson and Bezrushka are saying is impossible, at least before the Savior comes, a Utopia out of step with the level our society has fallen to, but how can we give up? Maybe it isn't just enough to be good to our own families or neighborhoods . . . I don't know anymore.

I had a friend once whose political ideas differed widely from mine. (Okay, I've had MANY friends like this, but I'm thinking of a particular incident.) She said that if the government would give more money back the people, then she would be able to be freer with her substance in giving to the poor. While that may have been true for her, she had a very good heart, what about the rest of us? I don't know if I would. Like most families out there, I feel like we are working really hard to make ends meet, and not always succeeding. As two income families ravenously try to accumulate more of the world's goods, home prices skyrocket and it becomes harder and harder to stay at home and afford a home in a neighborhood where your kids are safe. To me, more money in my pocket would mean less debt. It wouldn't mean an extra handout to the homeless shelter or more fast offering or checks to the humanitarian fund or United Way.

And so, if citizens have failed one another, perhaps government does have a role here? Just this week a very telling thing happened in our nation. President Bush vetoed the first bill of his administration, though it passed Congress with more than just Democratic support. It was a Health and Human Services funding bill aimed primarily at healthcare for poor Americans, particularly children. He called the bill, with is 4.5 billion dollar pricetag, "wasteful." The same day, his part was pushing a 40 billion plus spending bill for the Pentagon for 2008.

When we cease to care for the poorest and most downtrodden among us, no amount of money or weapons or homage to gods of stone and steel can save us.

57 Things I'm Grateful For

Why 57? You'll have to ask one of my old college buddies. In no particular order and with little respect to punctuation . . .

1. Healthy kids
2. Trials that are more temporal than eternal
3. A good night’s rest
4. Sunny November days
5. Maple leaf mulch
6. Blogger buddies
7. The crunchy sound leaves make when you rake them
8. A husband who spent his whole day off working
9. Last Saturday’s temple trip
10. Feeling needed in my calling
11. Good mail
12. Being caught up on the laundry
13. The ability to work
14. The desire to work
15. Knowing I'm a child of God
16. Goodly parents
17. A sister
18. Diego and Thomas and Curious George and Clifford and Bob the Builder and any others who have positively entertained or taught my kids over the years
19. Memories (so that I might have “June roses in the December of my life”)
20. Jane Austen
21. Books (books and more books, duh)
22. Indoor plumbing
23. Hair dye
24. Glacier National Park on that glorious July day I'll never forget
25. Nursery Leaders
26. Friends in many places
27. Freshly vacuumed carpet
28. Atonement
29. Love
30. Chocolate
31. Cello music
32. Two perfect days--one when I was 18, the next when I was 20; each time with a boy I loved dearly.
33. Photographs
34. A fresh pedicure
35. Chili in the crockpot on a cold day
36. A sleeping baby
37. Good teachers
38. The smell of apple pie
39. Serving a mission in a such a wonderful place with such wonderful people
40. Kindergarten and a bus to get Scallywag there every day
41. Joseph Smith's courage
42. The miracle of the IPod and being surrounded by the music I love
43. Temple marriage
44. Cookies
45. Goodwill so Scallywag could have "new" school clothes and I could have the most fabulously fitted boots (oh, and pants) ever.
46. My computer
47. “All I Want Is You” and Plantboy playing it on his guitar during our 1st date (yes, really; he said it was the only song he knew, but I'm not so sure. . . .)
48. Gregor Mendel for persevering even when everyone thought he was totally nuts
49. L O S T and Life so there is a Wednesday night date every week
50. Poopy Pirate’s freckle-nose
51. Dancing in the kitchen with my kids
52. My baby’s smile and his two adorable teeth just popping through
53. Straightening iron
54. Fresh, white hot rolls (Dr. Atkins can take his diet and . . . well, you know.)
55. Changing seasons
56. Cars that keep running to matter how many miles and abuse are heaped on them.
57. A world full of sensory wonders

Okay, you're turn. Pick a magic number and make your own list. I feel remarkably cheerful right now.

The Traveling Pants Exist

And I found them at my Goodwill last weekend. $4.50 of denim perfection. Perfect length, perfect rise, perfect flare. . . I do not have enough good things to say about these wondrous pants. But we'll never know if they fit you, because I am not sending these babies on. I always make the mistake of buying pants within six months of the time I have had a baby and I nearly ALWAYS regret it. My last pair of jeans is especially heinous, though I tried on probably 20 pairs before buying them.


But these pants spoke to me. Really.


I picked them up on a whim thinking, "If I get them home and they don't fit, there is a seven day return policy." But all the while I was fingering the blue goodness and willing them to be the magic fit. I got home and tried them on within about three minutes. The mantra was going in my head, "Pleasefitpleasefitpleasefit. . . " over and over and then. . . . oh, is there anything more sublime than trying on clothes that are perfect? Clothes that whisper lovingly to your curves, "Yes . . . THIS is who you are."


Unfortunately, my magic pants will not go to Greece this year, or soccer camp in Mexico or anywhere else interesting, but we'll see. A girl can't help but feel lucky in such incredible pants.

Nemesis is guest blogging this week for a friend on her honeymoon. As only Nem can, of course, she has made everything hilarious. The fuzzy black slippers to the temple bit was my favorite. Because, of course, on a day as wonderful as a best friend's temple wedding, you don't expect to see something quite so. . . . incongruous. She asked if anybody had any interesting clothing stories to tell and my comment was too long, so the second half of this post is a reply.

Some years ago, a good friend of mine got married in the L**** temple. It is a nice temple to be married in because if you pick your time just right (in other words, not the day after a semester ends or during spring break), there aren't a lot of weddings there and you get a lot of personal attention, including a bride's room all to yourself. Besides, the temple is beautiful and historic and all that jazz. Anyway, my friend Pammy was about 29 when she got married. Her husband was a few years younger, but both had been endowed for several years and really knew what they were getting into . The ceremony, done by Elder Featherstone, was touching and really special. The maturity of the couple was evident and you just knew they had waited a long time for the right thing.

While we waited for the resplendent and buxom Pammy to come out of the temple, a very flamboyant couple came out. The bride was probably a size 2 and looked about 15. The lucky groom was somewhat older and already a little light in the hairline. Without even so much as a how-do-you-do to her family, she beelined for a herd of giggling bridesmaids and flirting groomsman, all totally decked out in reception wear. I've never seen such weird dresses.

First of all they were red. Mind-numbing, bright beyond all reason red. The dresses trailed all the way to the wrist and ankle, but were nearly off the shoulder. There were ten of them. The waists were really tightly fitted, but the sleeves flared out in large points like wings or . . . I don't know, like a medieval sorceress. I realized that said teenager-bride's dress was exactly the same style, though pulled up slightly higher on her shoulders. The groomsmen were fully outfitted with vest, red cravats, and the works.

This isn't even the worst part. At their best, bridesmaid dresses are generally ugly. So, while her taste isn't fabulous, what do you expect if your colors are red and . . . well, red?

The worst part is that she and the gaggle of demons proceded to pose all over the temple grounds. And.I. Mean.Pose. The girls' preferred look seemed to be Charlie's Angels classic pose wtih the hands shaped like guns and everything.

There was another pose where the girl's stood with their arms stretched straight out at their sides in a V-formation, bride-girl at the front. It was slightly breezy that day so the sleeves flared out slightly behind them. Like a flock of seagulls. (Not the band; their hair actually looked quite nice.) This went on for a long time. My friend came out got her pictures, all the while dodging this group, and was finished before they were done. Her older family members seemed to be a slight state of shock.

I know, I'm sure some charitable person is going to comment, "Well, STM, would you rather they weren't married in the temple at all?" OF COURSE NOT. I just wish somebody older and wiser, if not able to influence her unfortunate fashion choice, could have at least told her what was and was (absolutely) NOT appropriate at the temple. I've wondered about that girl from time to time. If her marriage worked out. If she understands better now (as I hope we all do) the nature of the covenants made that day. If she cringes when she looks at those pictures. If she still has her sense of humor without a sense of diva thrown in. . . .

The world will never know.

Because this post has been a series of barely related items, isn't the baby cute? And of course our jack-o-lantern is a pirate.

How Many Presents Do We Need?

I listened to a very cool radio broadcast last night by Dr. Stephen Bezruchka. This link is not to the broadcast I heard; the broadcast is under copyright and has to be purchased, but the paper purports a lot of the same ideas. It is a lengthy read, but really worth it. He has studied population health for the last 20 or 30 years and cites the "sickness" in our society as the underlying cause of most medical ills. The radio program was more focused on mental health; the paper is more focused on physical health. Which, Dr. Bezruschka asserts, are linked so closely that one closely follows or comes with the other. I am going to study his ideas a little bit more and get just as liberal commie pinko as Nemesis; then I will blog a little more about what I've learned and what I think.

But the thing that has me really going today is that I went down to buy a very little bit of Halloween kitsch the other day--you know, cups, plates, stickers--and everywhere I look there are signs on all kinds of random products proclaiming, "Makes a Great Halloween Gift!" I found this thing below on-line in about four seconds. And obviously your kids need this because . . . .? Oh, right, the NEIGHBORS WON'T BE GIVING OUT POUNDS OF CANDY FOR FREE ALREADY!


The section of cards for Halloween has grown to be about a 100 feet long. The whole array of cards says "Halloween" at the top complete with all the labels underneath:
Romantic

For Him
Halloween--Best Friend
For Kids
For Grandkids
Halloween--Birthday
Thank You
With Sympathy
From Pet


Okay, I'm being a little snarky, but you get the idea. I know that retailers keep putting Christmas out earlier and earlier, but this is the first time I've noticed Halloween co-opted as a gifty holiday. Dr. Bezruchka talks at length about the problems with advertising too. Boy, have I got a doozy of a post coming up. Oh, and I've been reading The New Yorker lately as my subscription just renewed. I'm feeling awfully blue today . . . .

Lessons From the Journey

I was thinking this morning what to post about--more job stories, random thoughts I've had lately about the interconnectedness of all peoples and aspects of their religions, Celtic festivals manifesting as Halloween, or Scallywag's spinning (backstreet boy style) during the Primary program while the obedient children all around him sang AND signed "I Believe in Christ."

But none of these seemed quite right. Then, this afternoon, I went visiting teaching. I met one of the ladies we teach for the first time. Seeing as how I blog with NOBODY from this area, I'll give a few identifying details to help you see what valuable lessons I learned this afternoon:

She had two children die of a fairly rare genetic disease--one was 12 and the other was 9.

She has a son with such severe bipolar disorder that he had to recently leave a career of 12 years to move back in with her and her husband.

She and several of her siblings joined the church together, without their parents, when they were teenagers. It took many, many years for her parents to join.

Her husband joined the church about the time their son died, after they met Elder Maxwell.

Elder Maxwell sealed her to her husband in the Salt Lake temple after their son's death.

She had a late term miscarriage within two months of her son's death.

Bipolar Disorder runs in her family and she has had many cousins and siblings suffer with it.

She has one surviving child who has children and had to wait until she was nearly 60 to have any grandchildren.

She spent 20 years as an addiction counselor and speaks with joy about her work that way.

She has spent so much of the last few months visiting with grandchildren and caring for her son that she hasn't attended church very regularly. My companion and I had wondered if she was inactive . . . but the truth is that I have seldom meant somebody with such pure testimony and spiritual strength. Our visit was wonderful (except for my screaming children) and I feel like my trials have been very light. She spoke about letting go and trusting the Lord to be in charge and then told of some incredible spiritual experiences she has had a result.

I was truly taught today, though I was supposed to be doing the teaching.

Glad To Have Boys

There are days I wish so much for a daughter that it almost hurts. Then, there are the other days . . . .


My boys have really gotten into Diego lately so we spend some time every day watching Nickelodeon. I rarely get the TV shut off in time to avoid all of the commercials, and this latest product has put me over the edge for brain exploding madness.


I am sure I'll hear from all you mothers of girls out there telling me this is harmless. And with all the R E A L things to worry about in the world, you are probably right. Still, I can't help but think that you are setting yourself up for disaster allowing your daughter to play with a product that encourages spending money on princessy-stuff. The commercial is completely disturbing as girls in princess garb use their "debit" cards to buy jewelry and tiaras. What killed me is that the amazon.com product reviews were all about how parents didn't feel like the product worked very well.


I guess the parents who put their foot down on this kind of thing just didn't comment. And I'm really not sure what it is about this particular item. I have often though various cash register toys (especially in combination with food) were cute and could be good play to learn tools. I don't know, maybe the Disney cash register reflects what I wouldn't want my daughter to learn . . .


Now, I'm sure I've offended some of you. And if you saw the copious amounts of train related paraphenelia at my house you would probably say, "Who has fallen for every commercial trick of the American advertising industry?"


Probably me.

I Just Wish I Was Smarter

Some weeks back my mom went to a regional women's conference thing where Sheri Dew was speaking. As she often does, she related a story about the Prophet. Apparently she had dragged her feet for a long time over a professional decision that needed to be made; by the time she made it, it was nearly too late and she could have averted a near disaster if she had acted sooner. She was relating this to the Prophet because their meeting pertained to Deseret Book. The Prophet said little as she talked through the situation. As she finished, she shrugged helplessly and said, I just wish I was smarter."

The Prophet said, "I wish you were smarter too, Sheri."

??????????????????

Then he smiled, laughed at his own joke, and leaned back in his chair. Still, he didn't tell her he was kidding. He merely said, "I wish we were all smarter. I guess we just have to do the best we can with the gifts God has given us."

This morning I had my own I-just-wish-I-was-smarter moment too. You know, you go along for a while feeling pretty charitable and kind and getting along with everyone and then . . . .

B O O M

You do or say something you regret. This morning my sister and I were talking. She called to wish Scallywag a happy b-day and we shared the news from living in two different states, as we do a couple of times each week. Though my sis and I are not all that much alike, we tend to view certain things about the world in the same way. This is good--it gives us something in common and empathy for one another's perspective, but it can also make us judgmental and narrow-minded. Today, this commonality of opinion did the latter.

She and I ended up having a right good gossip fest about a couple of people (oh, and their families) that I really love. At the time, I guess the venting felt good or gratifying or something, but now I just feel gross. Shocker!

Why is it so hard for me to learn this lesson? This happens every few months. And yes, it is usually while I'm talking to my sister.

The worst part is that yesterday, a friend in our ward asked me to speak at the fireside for our youth next month. Topic: Let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly. Really, good, STM. Way to get yourself all fired up for inspiration.

If I can't be smarter, I just wish I would more frequently remember to do my best with the gifts God has given me.

Everyday Adventures

Every day kid adventures are a riot. Scallywag pretended to be a pirate all day today. He kept singing at the top of his lungs, "What do you do with a scurvy pirate? Make him walk the P L A N K!" He said, "Hey mom, I'm a really scruvy pirate. Smell me! ARRGH!" Maybe one day I'll explain to him what scurvy means.

Yesterday he spent the whole evening in a cape, terrorizing anybody he could get to play along. He kept telling me he was going to save the university from Dark Fader. (Translation--the universe from Darth Vader?) He can't decide if he wants to be a pirate or a cowboy or a farmer or Thomas or a superhero for Halloween. My guess is, as long as there is candy he just won't care. And in light of Halloween's imminent approach, PLEASE check this out.

Do Not Go Gently

I love living in a place where autumn really behaves like autumn. It is as if the year is saying, "I may be going to sleep for three months, but I will go out in a glorious blaze of color and bounty." For the many things I did really enjoy about living in Texas, autumn was the time of year I always wanted to be somewhere else. It didn't seem right to sweat through Halloween costumes or to run the air conditioner on Thanksgiving. Now we are living in a place that really does autumn correctly.

One of my blogger buddies apologized some days back on an email for not blogging more often. She says this time of year brings out her squirrel tendencies and she is so busy canning, yardworking and storing up that she has time for little else. This really impressed me. And though I don't have a yard of my own, there is so much inexpensive produce here by way of farmers' markets that I may have to actually teach myself to bottle up some of this autumn goodness to enjoy later.
Last Friday I took the boys to a pumpkin patch. You know how you sometimes get two hours of perfection with your kids? That was Friday. The baby woke up just in time to nurse before we met our ward there just after lunch time. The weather broke for a few precious hours and Scallywag and Pirate have seldom had as much fun in the mud. For a mere two dollars each boy got a hayride and any pumpkin they could carry. (The result is two very small, misshapen pumpkins. I like to think this says something about the Charlie Brown qualities of my kids.) I wore the baby the whole time and he didn't even fuss once. It was one of those moments when I said YES! I CAN DO THIS THREE KIDS THING! I won't give details about the afternoon of tantrums . . . .






So the next day, Plantboy (isn't he cute) and I decided that we would take the kids to another farm, a little further away and pick apples with them at a mere forty cents a pound. Scallywag is really into the Golden Delicious variety these days because they did a taste test during science time at school and it was the clear winner. Saturday was not the day of perfections. We didn't even manage a couple of hours of perfection. The weather was gorgeous, but there were a lot of people and the boys absolutely did NOT want mom and dad to go so crazy at the Farmer's Market there. Nor did they want mom and dad to sit and listen to the hilarious country band while eating amazing apple cobbler and ice cream. They wanted a hayride NOW. Unfortunately, the clydesdales needed a break just as we showed up and we had to boys tantruming so ferociously by the time they were back that it didn't happen. Still, the photos are cute and I'm sure the memories will fade enough that we'll do exactly the same thing next year.









I have no record of the exceptional apple pie baked on Sunday. Our hometeachers helped us devour it when it was less than an hour out of the oven. Try fresh cream (unwhipped) over your next slice of apple pie. Oh. It. Is. Divine.

Although I'm glad to know the truth of things scientifically and spiritually, I have such a love of the Greek myths. One of my favorite is the explanation for why the seasons change. Demeter, the goddess of the harvest, had a very beautiful daughter, Persephone, who married the God of the Underworld (I forget the details on this part), Hades. Demeter was in such despair that she turned the earth into an eternal winter, nearly killing all of the humans off. (You've got to love the passions of those gods.) Zeus had to intervene or there would have been no more life on the planet. He compromised with his brother Hades and half the year, he had to send Persephone back ot her mother. He agreed. The ancient Greeks built temples to placate Demeter, goddess of the harvest, so that she would bless their harvest enough to see them through the winter.

While there is not a shred of truth in the story, there is something archetypal, fundamental and satisfying about the storing up against winter, even in our modern life. I have been grateful this week for the harvest God has given me.