I think one of the biggest challenges in my life is determining the best way to spend my time. I am a person that loves to be busy. Elder Uchtdorf's latest talk, however, has made me think a lot about "busy-ness."
Like, why am I so busy?
What is my motivation? Is it something really noble, like I want to spend so much time helping others that I say yes too often? Or is it something more prideful, like I need to be seen as so indispensable that I stay busy so I can stay important? Probably some where in the middle.
I don't really think I love to be busy, but maybe I do. I seem to usually be busy. Here is what I am grateful for in this trial.
I am grateful for generally good health that gives me the capacity to keep going and going and going even though I don't know how I can. I'm grateful to parents who taught me how vital and important work is. I'm grateful for loved ones who recognize when I am burdened and find ways to alleviate my stress. I'm grateful that I care so much about how "things" turn out. This caring how things turn out is so strong in me. Again, not sure if my motives are pure about that, but I'm glad not to be a person who is content to let the world around me fall apart. I use to wish I was more laid back, and still have enormous admiration for the people I know who can just go with the flow, but I don't envy it any more. I have just decided to embrace my own crazy and work with me as I am.
I'm grateful to be busy, but my prayer this holiday season as at all others, is that I won't be too busy for the truly important things.