Work. Work can be really hard. I'm not talking about my mothering work, though that is very real and sometimes a trial. I'm talking about jobs outside the home. Yes, it is true that I quit my job as a paper girl in the summer, but besides expanding my tutoring hours, I also took a job as a TA for one of my professors. It was too good to resist. The pay isn't great, but the resume building is. I was the only masters student in the department asked to do it--the others are PhD students. I think I'm the only one who has ever really taught.
So why do it? The little bit of income wasn't absolutely essential. I quit my job in the summer for a reason, after all.
Here is the silver lining though. I really love to work. It isn't just about earning the money. It is probably because I feel like in these avenues of work I get a chance to use by best and most practiced talents. I feel natural teaching and interacting with students either in person or on-line. I am my best self when I'm helping others learn. My work with a long-time tutoring student with genuine struggles has been particularly rewarding.
I don't know what will happen with long time employment in the future. Sometimes the thought of getting up early every day to get myself and my kids out the door for a job is totally overwhelming and seems completely un-doable. But I also really feel that something will work out. Going back to school in this program at this time is the strongest bit of personal inspiration I've felt in years. There must be a reason for it.